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    • #141980
      Mellow
      Participant

      I’m still in shock denial that I’m actually in a relationship with a n********t I didn’t realise this until he traveled away and his behaviour dramatically changed in my eyes he was disrespectful to me and voiced that he didn’t care and can do what he wants constantly ignored me when he went away .then spoke to me when he came back after (detail removed by Moderator) week non communication.mainly asking for money .I didn’t know he was a n********t till the behaviour got serious then I realised that I’ve been living with this hell for years firstly the relationship I was not allowed to wear my hair certain way then was not allowed to wear certain shoes he inflicted the hair style thing on my son until now.I weren’t allowed any friends unless they look a certain way young and beautiful.he has always spoke about himself and his great he is when he never used to pay his rent .he always goes abroad buys fancy clothes and looks a crumpled up mess here.says he’s a chief in his country.spends all his money their .and nothing on me and kids but if I question it the kids eat his food and he pays bills. I’ve only just pulled him up on the rent.he says if I spend it silly he will stop paying.he is talking about building houses but not building experiences with the family .does not want me to work and build my own life.even spoke about leaving dosent care about me one bit .I didn’t even notice till now how he is to the point I feel like he hates me.I’ve been reading up on everything and everything I read points to leaving him because his behaviour is that bad.funny thing is he acts nice to other people but not me will do anything for others but not me .continuously says I’ve got lots of money whilst on benefits

    • #141990
      Twisted Sister
      Participant

      Hi Mellow

      yes, he’s abused you, he is an abuser, and its a horrible realisation of who they really are and what they are about. He wants power and control over you. What do you want to/can you do next?

      I think if you have got to that point of seeing that he really doesn’t care for you, like he hates you, and the fact that he can be a completely different person to others show how in control of everything he is.

      What will you do now the scales have fallen from your eyes and you can see through his abuse?

      warmest wishes

      ts

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