Can’t stand him even though he’s being ok lately

[Rainbowcloud]

Can’t get my head around how I feel about him. He’s been ok not majorly abusive for for two weeks.
I hate him I feel like he’s a fake and a phoney he makes me so unhappy he tries to be nice but I feel like it’s not real he’s living a lie.

[Rainbowcloud]

Nothing he does will change how I feel now. Can’t believe I let stuff what happened in the past go on I’m so stupid

[Anonymous]

The fact that we feel our abusers are doing well when they behave like humans for two weeks says it all really.

[Rainbowcloud]

Just can’t get over the fact he’s suddenly a changed man within two weeks of me telling him to leave. I’m just waiting for the nastiness to come back and he hasn’t really done anything or had one of his huge rants like usual he still does petty things though regarding the kids. Like one sneaked some (detail removed  by moderator) without asking so he gathers them all up to ask who is lying then asks the other kids who it was till they all grassed my oldest son up and went on and on about it I felt like smacking him in the mouth!
I just sat there like always and didn’t say anything even though it was killing me inside that he is so petty like that it was (detail removed by moderator) get over it!
These traits are totally undesirable and he can try to change all he wants and I can see he is trying but I do not trust him one bit he’s been so vile in the past how can it be

[Rainbowcloud]

I don’t want Christmas to happen I don’t want anything I feel like I’m having some kind of mental breakdown and ptsd because he’s being nice now and it’s worse in a way because I don’t believe it and waiting for the eruptions as it’s been two weeks so I know it’s coming usually Xmas day like always

[KIP.]

It’s classic cycle of abuse. I was stuck in it for decades until I found women’s aid and worked it all out. Round and round I went on that roundabout until I found the strength to jump off. It all makes sense now but when you’re stuck in it, using valuable time trying to work out his behaviour. Work with women’s aid to understand and free yourself. He sounds dreadful.

[LozzyX]

It’s the horrible cycle like Kip says.

A decent human would let you talk openly with them about how you are feeling etc but you know deep down what his reaction would be if you opened up to him , or if you took a stand when he was taunting the children over petty things. So he still has that control… You will do anything to keep the peace for now… And I know that feeling well about waiting for the next big blow up. The whole cycle of it all is torture

It sounds like you are waking up to what he’s about now which is good… Means slowly start to prepare for leaving.

[KIP.]

Everything changes when we know what they are. I remember having to pretend to be happy. My skin crawling everytime he touched me. The overwhelming depression because I couldn’t see a safe way out for us all. Lean on women’s aid. They saved me x

[Alittlelost]

I feel totally stuck on the same cycle. I feel insane atm because how staying is effecting my mental health, yet i dont feel like i can leave either. Ur not alone

[Author]

Posts