Child’s Maintenance.

[Bubblegum]

Need some advice please .Im divorced from my ex husband for past couple years .We have two children together so contact between us has been there .When we got divoreded a court order of maintenance was sorted out .For past couple years he has regularly paid me because of his abusive nature he has never looked after our children properly .So he has seen his children through a third party over years that has broken down due to his behaviour .(Detail removed by moderator) .(same time although he had moved on with other women he was still asking me out crazy ) .Anyway (removed by moderator) last year his Abusive behaviour got better of him again towards me so police were involved .He was put on bail over (removed by moderator) .The peace not seeing him was bliss .In (removed by moderator) police dropped his charges as they only went by last couple months of his behaviour but told him any contact for children needs to go trough 3rd party or he needs to take me to court regarding kids .( which I know he would never do ) .So last couple months maintenance for children has dropped drastically to the point this month nothing at all.( he did have a well payed job (removed by moderator) but now only working now again .(Removed by moderator) .He has always been a worker right up untill now ) .Trying to be better person I texted him regarding the maintenance.His reply was Im not working f**k off. BaiscLly then saying I wasted Police time and if he can’t see his children he won’t pay me .Im not supprised but feel completely devasted having to go through this heartache .Been told to try Manage without maintenance.If I go back to court it’s going to cost me (removed by moderator) .I only work part time as well .My gut feeling is saying to try court first but wait a bit longer do I can show the court he hasn’t been paying me etc .I did ring Govermrnt Child maintenance they could act straight away cost £20 but they only go by the last 6 weeks or so .Which I know don’t be much as he had not been working properly .Plus if I went through them the court order would become void .Apart from being emotional abusvier he is compulsive liar which you can’t reason with .He thinks he is above the law do as he pleases .Although he has moved on he seems hell bent making me mainly in happy .I divorced him
Due to unreasonable behaviour .

[Confused123]

hi hun

its so frustating getting money off them, if u left ex cause of d v the 20.00 fee is waived, i just constantly get csa to chase him, he had few months break of work, but i found out is back at work so got csa chasing again, even iof his not vworking and claming u can get csa to still claim of him, good luck, im in process of claimimg through his buisiness a/c

[Suntree]

I have always used the CSA and the new one. As he screamed at me one day he would pay for the important things but never the kids.
He is  (removed by moderator) behind, he will deliberately lose his job and do other jobs cash in hand so his contributions come to 0. Every now and then they catch up a bit with him.
Basically I can’t take any of his money for the kids for granted so I don’t.
Personally I would love for him just to admit he doesn’t want the kids and let them go completely. But while he has PR I will keep them chasing him.
And the new way of working likes to give them lots of chances to pay before they will look at collecting it.

[Serenity]

It’s probably a good idea to contact CM as soon as possible.

He’s liable from the day you phone them. You might not get paid any money due from the past, but at least from now until the future you know you will be covered.

If you report that there has been DV, they will waive the £20 fee, plus collect payments for you.

My ex is claiming low earnings and doing huge cash in hand jobs, but if any info comes my way which proves he must be lying, I report it. This way, they can collate a picture. Maybe in the future, he will need to back pay me because his lies have been exposed- who knows.

[Bubblegum]

Thank you for your advice ladies .It seems most of you go through The government Child maintenance.As I have a court order in place anyway and he’s breached his side things .My gut feeling was Try through courts first but worried wasting my money by doing this .Failing that it would be through Child maintenance.

[Author]

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