28th December 2019 at 9:19 am #94356BunnyParticipant
I think I need to get out but I don’t have a clue how with no money.
Christmas was hell I tried my hardest to make it nice. Despite the constant pull downs by him. He was in a foul mood. He went to the pub Christmas Day with family that we was hosting for while I stayed and cooked dinner. He came back drunk and started on me belittling me in-front of family. Made me cry to my dad. Didn’t sit down for his dinner open our baby’s presents together.
He is now constantly telling me he doesn’t like my family etc because they challenged him. Anyway now my family have seen him for what he really is I know I can’t hide it anymore.
Another thing his dog is really Nasty to our son. He bit our son on his hand on (detail removed by moderator) it wasn’t that bad didn’t make a mark really. But I was stood next to them both. It makes my life even more stressful as the dog constantly wants to be with us and follows us around. His dog is old and has health problems. We have been advised by the vet to have him either put down or for him to live with someone who doesn’t have children. Vet says not to have him in the same house as our son and that’s without the vet even knowing about what happened on (detail removed by moderator)
Partners mum said she will have the dog but partner still wants the dog at home. So this has made my mind up I want to go. But what are my choices? I have no money at all please help
28th December 2019 at 10:32 am #94361TiffanyParticipant
Call women’s aid. They will be able to talk you through your options. Don’t worry about the money. You will be eligible for benefits and you should be able to sort this once you are in a refuge. It can be hard to get through to the national helpline, especially at this time of year, so it is worth trying calling your local helpline number too.
In the meantime, try to act normally. Don’t let him know you are thinking of leaving. And if you can do it safely try to pack an emergency bag with all your important documents, a change of clothes etc and have it ready to go if you end up having to leave in a hurry. It sounds like your son is quite young, so possibly in a changing bag or similar? Another option is to pack under the guise of doing a clear out, and then leave the bag at a trusted friends house, or if you are close to leaving, even in the boot of the car.
28th December 2019 at 11:10 am #94367LisaMain Moderator
Good Morning Bunny,
I am sorry to hear that you had such a difficult Christmas. If you aren’t already in touch with your local domestic abuse service, you can find their details here. They would be able to explore all of your options with you and help you to work out what will be right for you to do next.
Also, remember that Women’s Aid live chat is available Monday – Friday 10 am – 12 pm, a support worker would be able to offer some support, you can find out more here: https://chat.womensaid.org.uk/
If you need more information about what to expect from a refuge take at the Survivor’s Handbook
22nd January 2020 at 5:09 pm #96231PRETTYWOMANParticipant
Hello Lisa, I just clicked the link you provided for woman’s aid chat…..you say they open from 10am to 12pm
well it says “chat offline” and its only 17:09pm now
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