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    • #75336
      journeyupwards
      Participant

      Hi everyone,

      I am wondering whether you have had a similar experience to me in the processing phase.

      I have survived 2 abusive relationships.

      From the day I left the second abusive relationship, for the last time, I experienced weeks of anxiety, confusion, euphoria and panic attacks.

      During this turbulent time, all the trauma from the abuse (which I did not perceive as particularly traumatic at the time) came out at once.

      I am seeing professionals for help and a diagnosis, but this is an especially confusing time… I cannot tell whether I am experiencing mental illness, my mind processing, or both.

      Is this experience common/ have any of you experienced this confusion?

    • #75338
      KIP.
      Participant

      Sounds exactly like what I went through and I was diagnosed with PTSD. When we are with our abuser we go into survivor mode where we just don’t have the headspace to work out what is happening to us so all our headspace and thought process is taken up simply trying to survive and predict his ne t move to keep ourselves safe. Whe our minds realise we are now safe, our brain then decides to try and process the danger and abuse we have suffered and it’s at that point I lost the plot. Flashbacks, intrusive thoughts constantly re running a film reel in my head of things he said, things he did. Always wanting to talk about it, just to get it out. Keeping a journal helped. Write it all down and make sure any counsellor you see is properly trained in trauma and domestic abuse. It’s a rollercoaster ride to recovery. But you will get there in the end x never ever use the words mental illness. It’s mental Injuries you’re trying to recover from.

    • #75343
      journeyupwards
      Participant

      Thank you so much for your useful message! It’s really encouraging to hear that my experience isn’t uncommon.

      I can very much relate to your message – I haven’t been able to stop talking about my experiences either, and have written down/ typed out a huge amount to stop myself talking about the abuse to my friends and family all the time. This phase was so intense that I thought I was experiencing hypomania/ mania with anxiety symptoms!

      I will definitely try to find a specialised counsellor, as you have advised.

      Thank you so much for your help

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