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    • #15998
      Serenity
      Participant

      It was my birthday (detail removed by Moderator), and my ex had my youngest.

      I didn’t even bother asking for my son to spend it with me, even though the courts told us to be flexible: he would have said no, as he doesn’t change anything, even though he expects us to be totally flexible.

      I would be quite prepared to let my youngest go to his if it were my ex’s birthday/ Father’s Day- because I’m not petty like that.

      Anyway, my birthdays are two a penny to me now, and in any case, my eldest’s birthday (detail removed by Moderator), so the focus is really on him. The birthday isn’t really the point. The point is that my youngest didn’t call me at all!

      He’s just texted now to say he couldn’t, because his dad took him to some remote place to a wacko gathering ( as he is acting like a teenager).

      I know for a fact ( because I know how cruel my ex is) that he was probably gleefully waiting to take my baby angel to a remote place where he knew he couldn’t reach his mum to wish her happy birthday- although this will have been done covertly.

      He hates doing nice things for people, and gets a high being as nasty as he can, making it as covert as possible. And he seems to have me as his target.

    • #15999

      Hi Serenity, i can understand your upset. I don’t have children and normally spend my birthdays alone so possibly I don’t understand it fully. If this were me I would view this as a positive, i.e his covert calculated malice towards you is a reflection of his bitterness inside. Although you have upset and trauma following your breakup and the past, you don’t hold such malice which eats you up as he does. Can you take comfort in that view do you think? I think is going to end up a very bitter & twisted old man whereas yourself, your life is positive and happy isn’t it (or on the way to being). X*X

    • #16004
      Serenity
      Participant

      Thanks HA,

      Yes, I can now just feel pity for him rather than real hurt.

      He is a very nasty and bitter person.

    • #16005
      godschild
      Participant

      Belated birthday wishes Serenity, how nasty of him to not to encourage your son to wish you happy birthday. Its spiteful to do that both to you and your son.

    • #16008
      Serenity
      Participant

      Thanks Godschild,

      It did occur to me that what he wants is for me to get upset with my son, who would feel hard done by because his hands were tied.

      My ex loved to put family members against one another.

      Luckily, I can see his game. So after I asked by son why he hadn’t rung, and he explained and wished me happy birthday, I just thanked him!

      I won’t be a puppet in his macabre show!

    • #16016
      Confused123
      Participant

      Hi Hun

      He 100% gurantee did this to upset u and to get a reaction of u that he wouldnt see, this is enough satisfaction for them, dont let him win , as your son gets older hw will see the games his playing, like i laways say beat him at his own game, do something special with your son on his return to celebrate your b day, dont think of it as he wasnt with u on the day , he didnt wish u happy b day that u cant do something together as a belated b day. Bet your ex loved taking him some where far in a no signal area. JUst read your last post, see even if they not with us i gurantee you was in your son thoughts, he is a child stuck in beteween his dad till he reaches age he can choose not to have contact, if he had it his way he would rather be with u ion your special day

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