Decision made, don’t know what to do next.

[Memand]

Hi,
I can’t stop crying today. There was an awful altercation at the weekend where furniture was kicked and I had my childhood thrown in my face as a way of trying to convince me that I’m not normal.
I can’t do it anymore, I have to get out. I’m just petrified now as I don’t know how to behave in the meantime. Do I tell someone I trust? Or should I keep it to myself? I have the WA support worker, but I don’t want to keep ringing her.
Every time I look at the kids I feel this enormous wave of guilt that I am planning to break up their family. I don’t know if I can find the strength inside myself. All I ever really wanted was a happy family and someone to love me and he knows that and uses it constantly. I’m starting a group support process at WA in a couple of weeks. Do you think that will give me the answers I need?

[Anonymous]

Hi Memand,

Phone the helpline or your support worker they can help you figure out the next steps. I am sure they won’t mind. You have made a really brave decision and I hope that things are not as difficult as you anticipate. Stay safe x

[Confused123]

Hi Hun

well done for seeking help, don’t worry about keep calling the help line they are there to offer u support, try and find out from your gp if there is any other support available in your area, i would try to get hold of the book callled why does he do that by lundy bancroft, it is a really good book and u will be able to relate to it. Don’t feel bad about spliting the family unit, u are teaching your kids a good message in life how to treat people correctly and saving them from emotional abuse, my kids used to see me get hit and verbal abuse, its horrible and till u r out u don’t realize how they are impacted. Are u close to anyone in your family or have friend that u could speak with

[WesternCloud]

He most likely has made you feel that in leaving you would be hurting the kids, please trust me that you aren’t. I will always maintain its much better to be a happy single mum than a mum trying to cope in a destructive relationship. Do you have anywhere safe you can go? I agree with the above that you should contact the support worker and utilise that service but I would also encourage you to speak to someone close by who you can trust, a good friend, a family member perhaps. Chances are that they may already suspect something is wrong even if you havent told them. My family did. Most importantly focus on the fact that you have made the choice to leave, you have to follow through with that dont wait around waiting for others to tell you what you already know.
You dont have to go through this, no one deserves to be treated that way, love should be unconditional and never make you sad, scared or anxious. Leave. Work on building yourself back up, spend time with your babies, life will be happy, you will be ok. In the words of John Lennon “it will all be ok in the end and if it’s not ok then its not the end”. Be safe x

[Author]

Posts