This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  KIP. 2 weeks ago.

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  • #85430
     Minniemum 
    Participant

    Does anyone else still do things that you felt you had to do to keep the peace?

    My ex always said we had to get up early and get out and about as he hated staying at home (despite always going on about he worked to pay the mortgage!). He hated it if we had lazy days at home.

    Today I don’t need to go out, but feel like I should just to give the kids some fresh air. But we’ve had a busy week with lots of late nights and we need to chill.
    I can’t wait to stop feeling the ‘pressure’ to follow the silly rules he had in place.

  • #85453
     HopeLifeJoy 
    Participant

    Well I don’t know if that counts but I still keep my mouth shut as old habit for fear to have everything turned against me, I don’t know if this is normal, good sense or if it’s a bad habit. No idea anyway I feel safe like this so I keep doing it.

    I hope you enjoyed a chilled day, surely your kids appreciated too. Habits take time to break but slowly and surely you’ll rediscover your own rhythm and learn to follow it more and more because it gives you peace 🙂

  • #85456
     KIP. 
    Participant

    Yes, it takes quite a long time to feel comfortable doing things that were banned by the monster. I would always leap out of bed early when he woke so as to avoid his sexual assaults. I’ve had one long lie in bed, I get anxiety if I lie there too long and that’s many years later. Freedom is a wonderful thing but there’s still that brainwashed feeling. It’s gets less and less. Try doing a little something deliberately that you know he would object to. It felt quite liberating watching trash tv with a MacDonald’s McFlurry.

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