Don’t know what to do

[Princess@]

Don’t really know where to start my husband has smashed my sons bedroom door and screamed at me and my (detail removed by moderator) kids through things about and is currently sitting in the bedroom giving us the silent treatment his reasons for his behaviour is the fact we have very little money and he’s saying that we sit on our bums all day while he’s at work iv asked him to leave which he has refused but this is not a healthy environment for my children and grandson who is in my care I need to know what to do I have no one to talk to or turn to as my parents are in their (age removed by moderator) and not in good health I have also found out he’s on dating sites again he says it’s because I won’t sleep with him but why would I want to when he’s a monster to me and my kids I can’t stop crying and really don’t know what to do sorry if this doesn’t make much sense as my head is all over the place

[KIP.]

Try to ring the helpline number on here. You can also ring the police on 999 if youre scared. Longer term get in touch with your local womens aid and speak to a solicitor. Most offer initial free advice. There is also Rights For Women who offer free legal advice over the phone. He is responsible for his behaviour. Noone else. Its not a healthy environment for you or your children. He sounds like a typical abusers. Just a nasty bully underneath. You dont have to live like this.

[iwillbeok]

Sorry that you are going through this princess@! No-one deserves this treatment. KIP is right he’s just a bully. Another resource is the National Centre for Domestic Violence. They can help you with applying for a non-molestation &/or occupation order.

I hope you seek and find the help you need to get away from this (I was going to say situaiton but no!), this nasty weak man.

Supportive hug for you x

[Lisa]

Hi Princess@,

Thank you for your post. I am sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds very stressful, unhappy and possibly dangerous for you and your children. You have been given some really good advice from other posts and I just want to re-iterate that phoning the Police on 999 or The Helpline at a safe time could all be good options. The helpline could talk to you about getting a refuge space and some safety planning that may be available to you and the Police could probably take some meaningful action against your partner given the fact that he has smashed up your son’s door and if you were able to speak to them about the level of coercive control that you have all be living under. Please be careful and don’t let him know that you are thinking of leaving or getting support as sadly that could put you more at risk.

You are not to blame for his situation. He is an abuser and you and the children deserve to be safe and happy in a home free from abuse. Please keep posting to let us know how you are.

Best wishes,

Lisa
Forum Moderator

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