excuses??

[Worrywart]

hi Ladies, ex has gone from threatening to kill me to social services all because i didn’t do as he demanded with our child ….now his new statement is im not having our child anymore until his minor affliction has been dealt with by gp ….he said if anything happens i will get the blame ….i know for a fact nothing is going to happen to him from it, do you think he is making excuses not to have him or is it emotional blackmail on me and/or our child?

[KIP.]

It’s sad but I don’t think he wants to see his child. He could easily take them himself if he was concerned. He is occupied elsewhere at the moment and he thinks he can drop his responsibility, make you feel bad and try to look blameless. I’m assuming his threat to tell social services was just more bullying hot air?

[diymum@1]

id leave it – dont give him even an inch – its hard to say what hes dping exactly but it sounds like control in that hes undermining you as his mum. (detail removed by moderator) hes just being difficult and trying to cover up his insecurities in that hes being an irresponsible father in wanting indirect contact. i suppose its projection xxxx id say do nothing ignore him

[Worrywart]

thanks KIP i think your probably right ….i think he will be better off with out him anyway.

[Worrywart]

thanks Diymum ….i will ignore him thing is he KNOWS how upset his son will be if he cant see him so i think he is trying to make me feel guilty either that or he just dont want to see him anymore x

[diymum@1]

it sounds like he is very selfish typical entitled attitude ie pick up and drop when it suites him xx it will back fire on your ex x*x

[Twisted Sister]

I think he’s trying to wriggle out by using the sympathy vote, that you might feel bad if he’s not quite right and needs to see a gp.

It’s cold hard manipulation. Ignore it and take him up on his offer to not see his child again but please make sure you have this documented.

If he’s not written anything,then text these words to yourself or something,but note it somewhere that at X time and date he stated he couldn’t see h child until he’d seen gp as a minor health issue and threatened to blame you and hold you responsible.

Just keep noting everything down,so he can’t backtrack.

Warmest wishes

TS

[fizzylem]

I dont know why you have contact with him WW, he sounds a nightmare and you seem to have a severe reaction when he says anything, can’t you cut contact with him and put all comms through a third party? I’m glad he’s moving a long way away as I think you need the peace it will bring, but I feel for your boy and how he will feel, although I do think once things settle he will be better off without him and being at the centre of it all x

[Worrywart]

thanks Fizzylem …i dont have no contact with him at all he sends messages through our eldest x

[Worrywart]

thank you Twisted sister …i have noted everything x

[Author]

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