Exhausted from it all

[Rockandrolldreamscomethrough]

For a few weeks now I have been making phone calls, telling the people that need to know, going to housing appointments, packing bags, making plans, linking in with my local womens aid, finding suitable properties and applying to try to get away from my abusive partner. I have told all the relavent people and I’m getting support from a few good friends and my work and also my local womens aid. I felt like I was moving in the right direction and was soon to be free. I am on a joint tenancy with my partner, he cannot be removed unless he chooses to do so which he won’t. I was advised by my local womens aid to go down and speak to the housing association I am
With to see if they would be able to take my name off this tenancy and swap me over to a new tenancy if and when a suitable property came about. I wasn’t expecting them to wave a magic wand but they basically said there isn’t a chance. They can’t re house me because they need his permission to take my name off the tenancy (when you remove a name off a tenancy it relinquishes the whole tenancy so I would effectively be making him homeless too) and obviously the whole point of me doing a planned move was that he did not know until I had the keys to a new place and was gone. Not much chance of that happening if I need his permission. The other option they gave me would be for me to be honest with him and tell him I want to end things (like I have done many times) and bring him down to the housing and get him to agree to move out and let me and our daughter have the house whilst they found him a one bed flat somewhere so he wasn’t homeless. Again, something he will not agree to do and is risky in case he was to get angry for me trying to leave. I said okay I will try other housing associations or the council. To then be told they won’t help me either because I already have a home and it falls to my current housing association to re home me and my child. So refuge is looking like it’s the only option at this point. My housing officer then says there’s one last thing he can suggest and that is to take it to the highest point and speak to the housing allocator and see if she will take it upon herself to re house me and my child. Which is great, apart from she knows my partners family extremely well, they all go back a long way. I then express how scared I am about her telling my partner or his family what I am up to. Not in a spiteful way but she might let it slip or something. I was crying saying I didn’t want her to know as I felt it was so risky. The housing officer told me it was the only option left to be rehoused with them so I reluctantly agreed. Should I of let him tell her? What if she tells my partners family? What if she comes round to my house when my partner is in? I am so worried. She wants me to call her anyway apparently, I tried this afternoon but I couldn’t get through, she’s not back in till next week late. I am feeling like I am getting no where, am I expecting too much? I would try to private rent myself but I have no money for a deposit, fees, and first months rent then I will have to furnish the place as my partner won’t let me take my things. Womens aid advised me that there is a bond scheme that the council offer but you do have to qualify. Even if I get that will that cover everything? I am just exhausted with it all and feel like I’m getting no where

[Tractor]

Hi
Google occupation order I know somebody who got one and the housing associations used that as evidence to get her partner off the tenancy. Ring the ncdv they are good.

To qualify for bond scheme you have to be at risk of homelessness which you are as you are fleeing domestic abuse . It’s so hard you take it all in when people tell you things. Half of the staff in housing have no clue ask do they have a safe guarding officer or specialised staff member who’s had dv training .

X

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