This topic contains 4 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  Anonymous 5 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #68117

    Hi I am just wondering if anybody has been or is being forced (detail removed by moderator) to see their abuser face to face to facilitate contact?

    To cut a long story short the (court details removed by moderator) contact has moved out of the safety of the contact centre where I never saw my abuser and I am now expected to facilitate contact face to face . Despite my gp (detail removed by moderator) to say it will have an detrimental effect on my mental health and well-being. I will never see my abuser face to face again to allow him to abuse me again and have more power and control over me and I feel it is against my human friends are kindly facilitating it for now but I need something long term . I am thinking of setting up a support group for women in my position so we can support each other not to see our abusers again , as I am not aware of anything in my area . Is this anything anyone would be interested in or has anybody ever been in my position and come up with a solution or group themselves?

    I have emailed my MP for support to facilitate a group and I am meeting him to discuss things further . I will be telling him how disgusted I am with the family courts/ criminal justice system and how the sexist ideas within it and lack of understanding of domestic violence and controlling and cohesive control are letting thousands of women down . I feel the courts should be a place of safety not abuse us further!I want him to take it into parliament especially as 25 November was the international day for no violence against women and children.

    I am so passionate I will not stop fighting for justice for myself and others . I will not be bullied and made to see my abuser who frightens me and has left me damaged .

    Thanks in advance xx

  • #68119

    Hi Freedomwarrior, I’m so proud of you. I also think or maybe I’m just hoping that what you’re trying to achieve is going to be part of what MPS are debating on the 16th in parliament.
    It’s a disgrace for judges to force this face to face contact, all it’s doing is allowing the abuser yet more power and control. It’s appalling that women’s feelings are still not being taken into consideration, that we’re not believed by some professionals STILL, and that these ba….ds can pull the wool over supposedly educated people .
    IWMB 💕💕

  • #68120

    Women’s Aid would be a good place to start. Contact your local one and see if they can support you. The Victim and Witness act says vulnerable victims of crime are allowed screens or video links and to be kept away from their abuser. Sadly this wasn’t applied to civil courts so that’s something that needs changing. It might be another angle. Why should it be any different in the outside world. If you’re vulnerable in court then you’re vulnerable outside court. Even if they deem you not to have suffered domestic abuse it’s your life and you can decide who you allow into it. Any contact with these abusers is triggering to victims. So by forcing direct contact they’re actually causing you harm.

  • #68158

    Yeh, I was faced with this. He wanted to meet I a public place to handover, as I said in my ,at post my daughter was having panic attacks. It wasn’t an option. It never left the contact centre again once that was In place. The thing is the court ask that you make your child available with out fail for contact. So In taking them into the Co ntact centre your holding up your e d of the deal. The thing is once your child is in the centre, if the staff feel your child or your child is saying theyre fearful or don’t feel safe to go to contaCT. The centre is he,d by child protection laws to say the child is not going. It took me thirty visits where this happen each time. When There’s no safe place to hand over contact stops. In my case it went back to court and they stopped it.on the grounds of emotional health. So it might be worth going back to court for reinstated contact centre. WA can do a letter plus risk assessment,GP,school,child therapist. Look up justice cobs practice directive it states cLearly the right of the child. It’s a,so your right under the human rights act and istabul convention, also UNICEF.

  • #68159

    Take a look at practice direction 1j it’s mundy MP these are the written stuff that needed. I did alot of reading at the time!!

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