Fed up

[lilaclady]

So my husband has been fine this week. Like nothing is wrong, being nice being normal, no incidents. It’s so weird. I know this is part of the cycle and I do not trust it one bit and I am not saying in any way that he’s cured (no way) but it’s just weird. I am sort of waiting for the next explosion to happen almost to validate my reasons to leave as currently it just feels odd that I am planning to leave with him being normal. I actually felt sorry for him as he went to bed in his bedroom last night he looked so sad and I felt like he is trying here a bit. I don’t sleep with him there as I need space from him and I have told him I need space and he needs to respect that need. I feel quite angry towards him at the moment. So he will be talking to me normally about things and I am snappy almost rude and I am so irritated by him. All I need is for him to say I have been a total S**T the past few years, I can see how I have hurt you and I respect that you need time and space and I am going to do everything I can to get this back on track. Not nasty one minute and then hey look I am fine now hurrah! But I know now this is the pattern..

He was on some drugs for his anxiety and the doctor has slowly taken him off those and onto another drug. And my husband is saying how much better he feels off the old drugs (yet to see what the new ones do) he said its been really hard for him feeling weird on them and I said yes I know and also it’s been hard for me as the last few weeks have been hellish with his anger.

Also I don’t think things are fine and I don’t think things are sorted…its just odd. Christmas also doesn’t help, festive time and feels super odd making plans to leave whilst planning a family christmas!!

I am guessing this is what the planning to leave rollercoaster of feelings and events is like not as black and white as I would like to think.

[EeyoreNoMore]

The drugs sound like a bit of an excuse for his behaviour. He will know by you standing up to him that he’s in danger of losing you; losing his fuel source.

Be prepared for Mr Ubernice as he tries to suck you back in under his control but likewise be prepared for Mr Uber(detail removed by Moderator) once he realises you are resisting his charms. It will all be your fault of course that the relationship is falling apart.

Stay strong hun, you’re doing great xx

[livingonaprayer]

I understand, as long as you go along with everything. Keep your feelings inside. Keep the peace, support them etc everything is find. As soon as u have an opinion they turns nasty. I know about the anxiety side of things, i feel so guilty when its bought up like i’m the one making it 10 times worse for them. Its up & down everyday. I talk to friends, not often but it helps & get me through the doubting moments. Keep positive!! We’re not mad we have every right to feel how we feel! Xx

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