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    • #165873
      RedPanda2023
      Participant

      So I had a message from his new bird he’s in a relationship with. This new bird has kids as well.
      The hurt I feel Is on another level. I don’t have words to describe my pain. The fact that this woman rubs it in my face that he’s a great dad to her kids! How’s he’s a good father, a good man. The bitterness I feel is on another level. I will completely block access to my daughter from him. He doesn’t deserve her. She doesn’t need him. He choice to walk away. He choice to abuse me. (detail removed by Moderator) Good luck to the (detail removed by Moderator)! I feel hurt and anger right now. I wish right I could just hold my daughter so close. I feel like I lost everything and failed. I haven’t stopped crying all night. I don’t know what to do.

    • #165907
      Lisa
      Main Moderator

      Hi RedPanda2023,

      It’s understandable that you would be feeling this anger right now. Everything is still so raw. You’re grieving the relationship with him still, the good that you had and ideas of the future together that you’d imagined. This can make it really hard to see him with a new partner, apparently happy and perfect. It’s very common for abusers to be really loving and attentive at the start of a relationship, to appear to be ideal partners. It’s likely that this is what’s happening with this new partner, she hasn’t seen the other side of the abuse yet. He also may well have misrepresented what happened in his relationship with you and is manipulating her to be part of continued abusive behaviour towards you.

      You haven’t failed and none of this is your fault. His abuse was a choice he made and you have been protecting yourself and your daughter by leaving and having minimal contact. I hope that you’re finding sharing here with others who understand helpful.

      Take care and keep posting,
      Lisa

    • #165929
      RedPanda2023
      Participant

      What hurts more is the fact that they are both rubbing in my face the fact they’re happy together. She’s made the statement several times to me “he’s mine”. Like what?! 😮
      I will never forget this betrayal. I spoke to someone today about it and I just cried, but I know the relationship wasn’t perfect but I tried with him. It literally knocks me sick. Why did he move on. I’m so hurt. I just feel this has now made me take more steps backwards. I wish things could be different for me and him.
      He was meant to be my life partner. My forever. I still love him a lot and I can’t bare this pain. I can’t say anything now. I can’t try to fix it. I can’t do anything. I’m so heart broken.

    • #165940
      browneyedmum
      Participant

      Look how insecure they’re acting by trying to cause you additional harm to make themselves feel better. They sound great for one another. He moved on because he has it in him to inflict that much animosity.

      Block her. Put him in ‘minimal contact mode’. And leave it behind. You’re too good for them xX.

    • #166073
      RedPanda2023
      Participant

      I feel they are both immature. She has no part of this! She needs to stay out of it! But nope she still rubs it in my face. I hope I never have to co parent with him.

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