Feeling at a dead end

[Anonymous]

As the title says I’m feeling at a dead end, like Iv hit a wall and I can’t see a way around it or over it. I don’t know what to do. When the last violent incident happened it got so bad I rang the police and fled the home on foot early ours with our baby it was one of the scariest times of my life…he’s in prison now. Everyone wanted to know me then, everyone wanted to see me and talk to me I was bombarded with police & other agencies for the first 1 or 2 weeks, but now nothing. Iv had plenty of ups & downs but had to get through it myself, I have my mum she’s tried to be there as much as she can but doesn’t always know how to help which is understandable. I just feel like it was such a whirlwind in the beginning and my life was turned upside down and all of a sudden floods or people rushed to see and then before I know it I’m stood here on my own left to piece everything back together but I can’t do it. I need counselling but they have been messing me around and now Iv been stuck on a waiting list god knows how long that’s going to be. But it’s unfair because I know that soon I’ll be getting bombarded with all these people again as the date for trial is coming up but where have all these people been when my life has been in pieces and I needed somebody? Nowhere. I was doing so well but hit this wall of depression again, my mind and emotions are all over the place, I’m wriddled with anxiety for what is coming up, I’m so lost and confused! I feel like I’m rambling on I hope Iv got to the point just suddenly my life changes and all these people appear and then all of a sudden they disappear and I’m just left to deal with it and soon they’ll all be coming back again and just UGH!!! I’m internally screaming it’s so overwhelming I could cry.

[KIP.]

It’s okay to cry and it’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Do you have support from victim support or women’s aid. They were good at helping me, especially victim support who even years later give me a call every couple months to check in on me. Try breaking things down into little pieces. How do you eat an elephant? One teaspoon at a time. It’s also okay to say to these people that you’re overwhelmed and need help dealing with them. Speak to your GP and search local charities that may offer therapy x

[Anonymous]

It’s so weird how I posted this last night and the police contacted me last night. I know they are busy and can’t be on hand all the time it’s just not a nice feeling being bombarded with people, then left, then bombarded again. What’s victim support? Witness care have been in contact with me a couple of times but they don’t really help for emotional support x

[KIP.]

https://www.victimsupport.org.uk
Google them. They support victims of crime x

[Lisa]

Hello FlowerBubble,

Just wanted to check in with you and see how you are feeling today.
As KIP as so rightfully expressed to you, all the frustration, anxiety and depression you are experiencing unfortunately comes with the roller coaster of trying to get the right help to see you through this extremely difficult time. Consistency in any support given is crucial, and again, I understand this is not what you are getting and I’m very sorry to hear this.
If you haven’t tried Victim Support (https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/ ) yet, it may be worth (as KIP mentioned) trying them too and see what they can do. Samaritans ( https://www.samaritans.org/ ), No Panic (https://nopanic.org.uk/), and SupportLine ( https://www.supportline.org.uk/) are emotional support lines that at least give you the opportunity to talk these feelings over if you are unable to secure something face to face at the moment. It’s important you don’t feel isolated at this time.
In meantime, do post here, letting us know how you are. Although court cases cannot be discussed in any detail on this forum, communicating here about how you are feeling as you go through such a process with other women who have been through similar may be very useful.
Take care,

Lisa

[Anonymous]

Thank you for all the information it’s been super helpful for me, I will look into victim support. I just feel like I’m being annoying talking about my problems etc but I think that’s just my paranoia x

[KIP.]

You won’t always feel this way so please reach out for all the help you need. One day you will be able to help others too x

[Author]

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