Feeling crazy after this

[Chocolatebunnie]

I feel so isolated from everyone. Hubby is making sure he’s getting along with kids, I feel a little left out. Not sure if I’m jealous or if I’m not used to it or what is going on, but I can’t shake a feeling of being alone and depressed.

My daughter has come out as transgender and she was contemplating suicidal (detail removed by Moderator) a go. I woke up to find her crying in middle of the night and she said an ambulance and police were on the way. Long story short we ended up in a and e and she was sent home after seeing crisis team.

Hubby understands this much but he doesn’t get how it’s affected me. He’s been distant because I don’t want to get intimate but I don’t feel like it.

We were at a family gathering (detail removed by Moderator) I don’t get along with his family. He was I thought a little snappy with me or off and I mentioned this, besting in mind it’s hard to go to a family gathering when things are uncomfortable but also with the week we had had with my daughter I hoped for a atm around my shoulder. His reaction was to be irritated and said I’m not affectionate to him.

I’m so sad with everything that’s going on, I feel it’s me, was I imagining his attitude towards me, should I be more affectionate I’m so out of anything to give right now.

[Iwantmeback]

Hi CB, I remember feeling happy my oh was getting on with my daughter so well and then also feeling jealous too. He was what they call triangulating us but obviously I didn’t know that at the time. He can’t stand her now, talks nastly about her,accuses her of being loose. He was always tougher on my son tried a few times to do things with him but he treated him so differently from the of. I believed him when he said boys have to be toughened up no matter he was 5,6,7 or8. Both my children are emotional wrecks.

You’ve had a huge occurrence happen within the family, I’m glad your daughter is doing better. She must be feeling so confused and alone just now. In Scotland we have the TIE campaign, it’s about educating in schools. The young man who brought it to public attention won a Young Scot of the Year last year.
You’re feeling confused yourself and your husbands attitude isn’t helping either. He’ll turn this around and make it about himself or use it to berate you with at some point.
There is help for families of transgender children out there. I’ll pm you in a while. Xx
Take care you are not alone with this and neither is your daughter.
IWMB 💕💕

[diymum@1]

i think hes manipulating the situation, hes getting the kids on side its abit like ‘divide and conquer’ if he gets them on this with him it carries more emotional clout over you. your now thinking you should try harder – you see the kids getting along with him so your reasoning gets thrown out of the window. you know when people say go with your initial impression? know for sure he is behaving in a manipulative way – he is keeping you sucked in so that you wont leave him xx keep reaching out for support – your gut instinct is you have nothing more to give and thats beacuse the reality is he is bleeding you dry emotionally – which leads to powerlessness – what he wants xx power

love diymum

[fizzylem]

Interesting how when you need to lean on him, need his emotional support, he turns on you and makes it about him, you’re not giving me affection, rather than being able to give you what you needed, he saw you were feeling vulnerable and attacked you, ‘youre not affectionate with me’. T*t for tat. A caring adult would not act this way, the caring adult would see you needed comfort and give this to you.

Of course you dont feel like being intimate with him, because you have learnt he doesnt give you what you need when you do, and you dont feel close to him. Try not to listen to him, and listen to what it is you need here, listen to you, your truth, you are not wrong for feeling this way, feeling like you need to withdraw, this is because it feels safer, you know you cant trust him to do what is right by you.

Sorry to read about the difficulties your daughter is going through; hoping there is some transgender support in your area for her. FL. x

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