Feeling really confused

[Starmoon]

I’m on a single mum’s page on social media.. it’s really good for some things.. in fact i wish I’d found it when i was pregnant with my youngest.. but anyway, the page has hundreds/thousands of members and this is the UK alone… almost every day the posts almosr almost the same.. men leaving women with children and or pregnant. It’s like most men in the UK do this. But the things that are conflicting me are this, are all men the same, are they all abusers or should we be more tolerant. So many of these ladies accept that their ex left them and didn’t love them. Apparently that doesn’t make the man abusive… so what’s to say my ex was.. perhaps he’s just the same as any other man out there. I dont want to allow my ex 50/50 access to my children but i have no legal reason not to. He’s never been charged for anything he’s done to me.. and I could never prove to myself let alone anyone els if he was mentally abusive or if he just didnt love me?! My reasons for not wanting him to see the children are selfish (i dont stop him just wish i could)… am I really alone in thinking it’s not ok to abandon your family and then to be able to pick and chose when you play daddy of the year? I do have two children by two diffent dad’s and I called time on the relationship with the first one, because he kept leaving and coming back.. I lost trust in him but if he’d stayed- I’d have been with him for the rest of mt life) and with my ex- no matter what he did, i stayed. Why is every thing including people so disposable these days

[SunshineRainflower]

I remember your ex being extremely abusive Starmoon, but it is easy to forget, I often had the same doubts you are having now, abuse is confusing. Can you write down each incident of abuse? I found it helped to read it when I got confused and it was amazing what I had forgotten.

[Author]

Posts