Feeling terrible lately

[teatime]

I have a chronic illness as well as having survived abusers twice over.
I am in a bad way accommodation and income wise. This is not likely to change, and I have taken some steps and been assessed and granted a benefit for instance. That will tell you how I struggle. I have a partner who is more of a very close friend.We are quite poor.
Something is really hurting me. A family member has some accommodation which they said me and my partner could live in till we get sorted out. This seemed a great solution and I thanked them and was very very happy.When I was invited to see it I was treated to bullying directed at my partner but also at me, saying it was our own fault we were in need. This bullying went on for over an hour until I said how much I thought my partner was lovely and such a good person ( they are). They looked ashamed and shut up.
Then I had to go and view it and help with something that needed doing there ( yes I know, it’s mad). I was asked if I liked it and I said yes but by then I was confused, frightened and feeling very ill because I was now told we could not live there after all. The family had changed their minds.

We went home and I felt devastated.There was an extra reason i wanted to be there near- proximity to my aged parent whom I love so much and may not live much longer. I have always had such support from my own tiny family. I have no children due to my health breaking down during marriage.
I also found that another close relative had been bullying my partner and had said rotten things about me and probably completely messed up our chances of this place as a home.
I have always been kind and supportive to everyone in this family, who are not my own.
The previous tenant was also a family member who has passed away. They lived rent free in some luxury paid for by the family. We were proposing to pay rent.

I feel devastated, as though I cannot trust a living soul. My partner is very kind and gentle, his family remind me of the toxic abusers I have lived with in the past.

I now feel I do not want to be associated with more abusers but I do now know what to do because I love my partner. I have become very depressed and frightened and angry and I keep going on about how nasty they have been. I wish I could shut up and believe that people are good and kind.

[Twisted Sister]

Hello Teatime

After what you’ve written its no surprise to me you have been feeling terrible.

It always feels horrible being ‘played’ this way. It’s cruel and nasty and really not someone you want as your landlord! Eyes wel and truly opened to them. A horrible crushing blow though when you thought things could be better, got your hopes up to be dropped.

You are a lot better off without them, they sound awful.

The thing to remember is they are the nasty ones, the miserable lives they lead when you are the decent ones, kind and caring for each other, they don’t have that.

I hope you can keep looking out for something better and know you’ve had a lucky escape there!

Take care of you and each other.

Warmest wishes ts

[teatime]

yes, that’s true! Be a monster landlord! Thank you xx

[Ayanna]

That’s awful.
I would give them a piece of my mind and that would not sound nice.

I am currently in a situation with a family member who thinks they can abuse me. I have come onto them like they never expected it and I made the war big. I made everyone aware that for sure I do not take sh.. from anyone and they are neither needed nor welcome in my life should they ever attempt to badmouth me or spin some intrigues against me. I let them know that I look through them and their money does not impress me.

I am sure you and your partner can make it without them. It may be hard. Consider to pester the authorities daily for support. Persistence will get you where you want to be.
It is better to be poor and independent, instead of living in a pretty house at the mercy of abusers.

Much love to you xx

[Author]

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