Fighting the tide

[Eggshells]

I’m really struggling to lift my mood. I’ve done all the things I should do but I cant seem to pull myself up.

I’m not expecting that anyone can help, I just need to offload. Hope that’s OK.

The house I’m supposed to be buying has hit more snags. The current owners seem like real cowboys. I’m moving out of my rented accommodation in (detail removed by moderator) weeks and it’s beginning to look like I’ll be homeless again – (detail removed by moderator).

I’ve just been getting quotes from local storage firms and the reality of having all my stuff packed up in a 70sq foot container again is just really depressing.

I don’t have a job now so can’t afford rent so I’m going to have to move in with my parents indefinitely. I’m really close with my Dad but my relationship with my Mum is very difficult and it won’t be easy for my adult sons to visit

This is not what I thought my life would be at this age.

This is supposed to be a civilised society so how cone the odds are so heavily stacked against victims of abuse whilst abusers live the life of Riley?

[Cantmakedecisons]

PM’d you x

[Lottieblue]

Hugs hugs hugs 🤗
X

[littledove]

Sending big hugs to you ❤️

You’re such a strong and inspirational woman

Everything will work out and fall into place when it needs to

Also, don’t worry, karma always comes to these people eventually.
And in fact their karma is having to live their life the way they do, never being able to love, always feeling in the need to have control to feel the slightest bit fulfilled.
I’m sure you’d much rather be the wonderful, loving woman you are than in their shoes❤️xx

[Watersprite]

So sorry to hear this eggshells so awful when you can at last see a glimmer of a future and then the rug is pulled. Housing insecurity is grim! It’s not surprising your mood is low. I totally agree we lose pretty much everything and they seem to have it all. It’s a battle on so many fronts safety housing health kids housing finances services justice system arrgh!
BUT – you win this is a blip you are brave kind intelligent wise valuable helpful and inspirational. He is an abuser always will be unable to feel or give what a sordid existence scuttling around pretending to everyone he’s something he’s not but he has to live with that not you – anymore. You did the hardest thing you left this bit isn’t easy but it will pass you will get a place of your own maybe even a better one! And this will be blip the future is in grasp hang on – sending warm wishes x

[Eggshells]

Thank you lovely ladies. It’s weird reading how you perceive me but such lovely kind things to say.

Thank you so much for responding. You’ve reminded me of my values which does really help.

Sorry, I do get these blips from time to time. Sometimes I think I just get exhausted with trying to stay positive.

People I love are getting ill too. I just found out today that someone I depend on has changes that need to be kept an eye on. He’s had a (detail removed by moderator) but there’s only a tiny chance of it actually turning to cancer so I think we all thought he was home and dry.

Now they’re worried enough to move him to much more regular check ups.

Another close relative has also been really ill. Not sure about his future yet.

It just feels like one thing after another.

[Cantmakedecisons]

Never apologise for how you’re feeling, it’s real and it’s true. Keep posting for support x

[KIP.]

Just sending a virtual 🤗 hug and a small reminder that the tide does change and so will things for you x

[cakepops]

Life can have huge ups and downs, but the main thing to remember is that nothing lasts forever. When I have been at my lowest points things have always suddenly turned around unexpectedly.

Remember that abusers are never happy people. I sometimes get upset about how easy my ex has things, but then if he was actually happy with his new life and partner he would be leaving me alone instead of wasting so much time and energy causing issues.

Once things have settled down for you in a practical way perhaps some counselling or CBT would help. There’s usually big waits on the NHS so you could ask to be referred now and the liklihood is you’ll be less busy once you’re at the top of the list.

[Eggshells]

@KIP thanks for the hug and the positivity xx

@Cakepops thanks for your reply. I’ve already had trauma therapy which just succeeded in re-traumatising me.

I’m about to start EMDR. The timing isn’t great but I’m beginning to think it never will be. I’ve got high hopes for this as it gets really good feedback. I am worried that I won’t get the privacy I’ll need for it once I’m living with my parents though.

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