First Christmas of Freedom

[Tiffany]

This year I spent Christmas in the same place and with the same people as last year. the only difference was that in place of my abuser there were the three partners of my cousin’s. One just bought a house, one just got engaged and one brought their partner up for the first time this year. Then me, who left her fiancé, lives with her parents and is resolutely single. I was honestly expecting to feel down and very much like the family failure. Instead the whole day was filled with a joyful lightness. I had no regrets about my choices. Having dreaded Christmas for months I ended up having the best one for years.

I know this will not have been many of your experiences of Christmas this year, but I hope that it lies in all of your futures.

[duvetday]

Hi Tiffany,
Aw that’s great to hear 🙂 I had a similar experience. x

[KIP.]

That’s great. Often our fears and paranoia are a result of our abuse and it often works out better. Just need to take that leap of faith.

[Tiffany]

I am working on leaps of faith, and returning to a place where good times are mostly a state of mind. I was actually ill this Christmas with a cold which made my chronic illness flare up into hours of sleepless pain, but I just gave myself permission to only do what I could manage, to take naps, and demand that I got a comfortable chair, because I needed it to manage and I had a most lovely time.

[Tiffany]

I used to be very good at the happy state of mind. I thought I lost it when I became ill. I found chronic pain very hard to smile through at the start, and then I started a relationship with an abuser. Turns out that once one is used to it one can have happiness even with pain. It was merely the abuse that sapped my joy, and with it removed I can be positive again.

[Ayanna]

Well done!
Life is better in every situation without an abuser in it, that is a fact. 🙂

[Falling Skys]

Great to hear x

[Janedoeissad]

Tiffany, I’m so glad you had a good Christmas.

I felt so anxious about Christmas as all my previous ones for years were horrendous and he made them hell.

My day yesterday was AMAZING. Spent with the people I adore and who adore me. They even told me they’d missed me all the previous Christmases and this one was the best yet. To be in a position where I improved someone’s Christmas moved me to tears.

For years I was told I was rubbish and had ruined Christmas.

I’ve text friends who helped me to thank them for helping me get my life back and right now as I’m crying happy tears again I want to thank all of you. You helped me get here and you all deserve some exceptionally good karma.

Love and hugs to you all

J xx

[Sunshine]

I also had a pain free Xmas even my mum commented on there being no s**t. Year after year I had hassle! Long may it continue 😊

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