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I don’t even know if here is the right place to post this but i just feel so lost.
A few months ago i started acknowledging that maybe the way he treated me wasn’t okay, but as things got better i just brushed it aside.
Fast forward a few months and he has left me again. This time it was because i have been struggling with my mental health recently, and i couldn’t come see him a certain weekend anymore due to other commitments. He saw this as me putting everyone else before him. Which i worry is true. In the space of 2 hours things went from happy to an argument blowing up and he left, blocking me on everything. It’s been almost (detail removed by Moderator) now and i’m having a really hard time. Even though part of me believes that maybe the way he treated me wasn’t okay i can’t help but feel like this is all my fault.
All the other times he has come back so i’m finding it hard to let go. Even though i know things weren’t great i do love him with all my heart and am finding it super difficult without him. It seems as if he is moving on already after our very long relationship which is making me feel i really am not good enough.I literally just feel like him coming back is the only thing that would make me happy again.
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The fact that he’s treating you like this over something trivial shows exactly what he’s like and unfortunately I doubt it will get better. You feel like it’s your fault as he is making you believe that by acting so drastically. Punishing you for not putting him first whereas a caring, loving partner would be understanding and there to support you.
Deep,down I’m sure you know that if he came back you won’t be truly happy, sometimes you will as I have no doubt that at times he would make you feel like a million dollars and other times like the worst person in the world.
You are good enough but for someone else who is more deserving of you. You said that the way he treated you wasn’t right but you brushed it aside.You deserve better. Be strong, you will get through this and eventually realise this is actually a godsend. Take care ❤️
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