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    • #12093
      SilkyHalide
      Participant

      I can’t believe how I doubt myself. I was wavering a tiny bit after things came a little bit right(er)last night.
      But he’s asked two requests through the children. Such that if I say no ( as I have for the one that effects the children most but the other I will say no directly to him by email) he is making them feel I am saying no to THEM so the consequences to them are my fault. As opposed to his fault for not being organised or trying hard enough to resolve for himself or an unreasonable request or all of the above.
      Short term the children are going to hate me more. Long term it can’t be much worse so the answer is still no which leaves him in a hole!

    • #12098
      Ayanna
      Participant

      Can you not sit the children down and explain to them why you make certain decisions? They will understand and probably look through him with time. x*x

    • #12102
      SilkyHalide
      Participant

      I would if they would ever come to see me. It’s mostly over the phone. Plus they always give me third degree. My decision is mostly based on how he is treating me and how the problem he needs me to help him out of is of his making and because he doesn’t take responsibility. He’s never helped me in the same situation the other way round. I’ve been the one left with time and stress and asking favours of friends etc.
      Most other times I have helped him out and in return he’s kicked me in the teeth (metaphorically)
      I’m not doing it anymore. May as well leave him in a hole and kick me in the teeth than help him out and then get a kick in the teeth! How do I explain that to the children!? 😉

    • #12103
      SilkyHalide
      Participant

      They are teens who’s dad has reinforced thier view I am a bad mum and a liar.
      They won’t trust my explainations at the moment.

    • #12122
      Confused123
      Participant

      JUst let the kids know u r there for them if they need u, hopefully in time the truth willcome out, its horriblw when they with exa nd they make us out to be the bad one , i find ocnsistent message sink in slowly

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