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    • #143621

      He’s been arrested didn’t want this I thought police are confidential when reporting non emergency incidents I was only concerned because I was worried he would try and take kids our country without consent and wanted to control .I did not want this what should I do they said it’s because I’m in emotional abuse but now I don’t know am I being emotionally abused?im confused .

      Is this gaslighting ?(detail removed by moderator)

    • #143635

      So sorry you feel s confused about this. I was the same with Police, it’s actually really hard to understand their role, but as lon as you just tell them what’s bee happening and how you’ve bee feeing, they will find what the crimes are. In your case, they have picked up on emotional abuse, the will likely take more details form you and refer you to the Freedom Programme, tha where you’ll understand the types of behaviours and the abuse, which can be very enlightening and answer slot of questions, yet is also a bit shocking because it exposes what you’ve been subjected to, can be upsetting, but weirdly good to get out your system…it’s such a hard, difficult time, but stick with your instincts and as everyone always tells me, it’s baby steps and takes time, be kind and patient. You’ve done nothing wrong,in fact, it was right to tell the Police. Hang in there 🙂

    • #143654

      Taking children without the other parents consent is a serious crime mellow, I know you didn’t want this level of involvement from them but as I’ve said in the past I have had fears myself from his shifty behaviour with everything, yes he is abusive and maybe in a way this awareness of what he’s doing and how he’s being is coming out in the open and you may be able to get out sooner and get him away from you (I dont know why you aren’t put as an emergency for housing) I also dont know how you cope with the stress of it all, use that resolve you have to fight for your future 🌹🍀🤗

    • #143657

      I don’t want this drama all

    • #143658

      It might feel,like drama but it’s actually safeguarding you and your children. We minimise abuse when we are in an abusive relationship. Do you have support from a local domestic abuse charity?

    • #144424
      Waving not drowning

      I could have written this myself Mellow. It is so traumatic particularly when children are in the house.

      What gave me some comfort was the police told me they make their assessment of the situation and make their own decisions. I didn’t want him arrested either I thought that the police would act as mediators and tell him his behaviour was unacceptable and to calm himself down. But he didn’t calm down and he kept going and going which is how he ended up being arrested.

      It all happened so quickly it feels like a bad dream. Of course because he is unable to take responsibility for his own actions he is blaming me for the arrest. I didn’t even phone the police – someone else did.

      I also googled whether you can be responsible for the arrest of someone else and the fact is you can’t.

      We’re all responsible for our actions and sadly sometimes third parties need to intervene to call time on abusive behaviour. Hope you’re ok. You’re with friends here x

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