Hello😀 Advice needed

[Unhappydesperate]

Hello 😀
Thank you for taking the time to read this. It’s amazing that so many people are going thru similar issues to me. I feel so totally alone.
I discovered yesterday that my young daughter said that my husband refers me to “it” and that she doesn’t like it. After having read many of the books entitled “a child called it” I realise that this is how I am getting treated like this my both my husband (soon to be ex) and my three children as they are copying his warped example.
Life at home is horrendous as he flatly refuses to move out and he is manipulating /poisoning/alienating my kids from me. I feel totally heart broken as he wants sole custody of them all.

Any advice any one can offer would truly be appreciated

X

[Confused123]

hey hun

i would call the helpline and ask for guidance and advise where u stand in terms of rights, when we are with them we cant think straight , thats why we need outside support, keep reaching out to us , please do not give up , its horrendouse when they manuiplate everything, im glad u can recognise the abuse i was in complete denial, even that is a step

[EeyoreNoMore]

Hey, welcome!

Take heart that your daughter has recognised that this is wrong and has confided in you.

Take the opportunity to build your strength before you take the plunge – we are all here for you and so is the WA helpline (they are fabulous by the way).

Document everything you can but make sure you stay safe. See if you can speak to a solicitor to find out your rights.

Good luck xx

[Unhappydesperate]

Thank you both for your advice and for taking the time to respond.
I have been living in this nightmare for nearly a year and I’m getting to the end of my tether as he refuses to move out. So you can imagine what the atmosphere is like for me and my children as we just don’t talk which causes its difficulties.
The situation is “toxic ” for my children so the sooner this is over the better.
I have to say WA (national line) have been amazing, I have total admiration for those people that are there to listen and give advice.
X

[Anonymous]

Hi The last few years I felt the same, Lives in fear, I was referred to, to my face as woman or spastic. My son as (detail removed by moderator). Then when I said please don’t call us that, he’d say I was only joking, can’t you take a joke! My son has been seriously bullied at school & was very conscious (detail removed by moderator). Abuse always gets worse, I hope you are away soon xx

[Miles]

Hi
I completely get where you are
This is the first time for on here
After x amount of time seems like a life time I have taken steps to leave
I have walked out before and always returned the same day not being confident to do anything about it or to make the call to help me leave always with my young son in tow
I feel so much stronger now than I have ever felt, I don’t love him or even like him which I think has helped in my decision
I need a fresh start with my son
Up until now I have begun to really think I am loosing the plot
I know it’s because of how he has made me feel about myself
I have an appointment with housing next week
Have spoken to my local IDVA for support as well as a work colleague who has been through the same
So I’m doing it
I’m making those important decisions and steps to finally leave and be happy

Us women are stronger than we think

I also googled the word survivor …
It means fighter …. x

[Miles]

Funny thing happened (removed by moderator) they sang the song below
Says it all really x*x

I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath
Scared to rock the boat and make a mess
So I sat quietly, agreed politely
I guess that I forgot I had a choice
I let you push me past the breaking point
I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything

You held me down, but I got up (hey!)
Already brushing off the dust
You hear my voice, your hear that sound
Like thunder, gonna shake your ground
You held me down, but I got up
Get ready ’cause I’ve had enough
I see it all, I see it now

I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter
Dancing through the fire
‘Cause I am the champion, and you’re gonna hear me roar
Louder, louder than a lion
‘Cause I am a champion, and you’re gonna hear me roar!

[Unhappydesperate]

Hiw cery true Miles.
It’s amazing what songs come up on the radio that have real good meanings and associations with certain things in your life.
I hope you manage to get yourself sorted for yourself and your son xx

[Author]

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