Help, i think my husband is planning to do hurt me and my kids.

[Xxxdreamcatcherxxx]

My kids had contact (Detail removed by Moderator), they came home saying they had seen photos of my sons bedroom and our back garden on his phone. Police informed and they are going to have a word. I know he is stalking me. Anyway i found a message on my daughters phone on her (Detail removed by Moderator) acccount, saying that he misses us and that we will all be together soon. Im scared hes planning to take our lives and his. He told my kids he still cares for me a lot. Police even admitted sounds like if he cant have me no one can. Any advice greatly received. X

[fridges]

If you are feeling this way, more likely he is capable to do something.
Get yourself couple of personal alarms, which cause big noise.
I have it in my bag and you can have them around the house too, where you can reach them, if you can not reach the phone. They can attract attention.
May be if you can ask someone to stay with you for some time, until things will settle. So you will not be alone?

[Xxxdreamcatcherxxx]

If got the house all secured just when i leave the house. I really think he is capable of it. He can be violent, and especially if he is under the influence. He has threatened in the past to burn my house down x

[KIP.]

Can you go into a refuge for your own safety? Speak to women’s aid for support. The police can put a marker on your home for a fast response should you have to ring 999. Trust your gut. You know this man best.

[Lisa]

Hi Xxxdreamcatcherxxx,

Well done for reporting your concerns to the police regarding your husband. Abusers are very unpredictable and the safety of you and your children are priority. Did you tell the police about his previous threat to burn the house down and your current concerns of him causing you and your children harm? Please do ensure the police are aware of everything.

There is support available from the National Stalking Helpline (run by the Suzy Lamplugh Trust- https://www.suzylamplugh.org), this is available on 0808 802 0300.

The 24hr National Domestic Violence Helpline is available on 0808 2000 247 to discuss your options including a safe place to go to. The helpline is a busy service but there is a voicemail to request a call back at a safe and convenient time for you.

Do you have support from your local domestic abuse service? They can be find here. They can offer ongoing emotional and practical support.

Please keep logging your concerns and reaching out for support. You and your children shouldn’t have to live in fear.

Best wishes,

Lisa

[Xxxdreamcatcherxxx]

Hi lisa yes all concerns noted, he did have a restraining order but thats ended now. He is capable of anything, kids told me had pics of my boyfriend on his phone, plus my sons bedroom and my backgarden. I have no clue how he has them, we presume for stalking. Hes been warned and warned about it.

I am seriously considering a refuge, because my nerves cant take it anymore. I have to call rape crisis as well, as i know now i was being pressurised into sex and actually raped.

I have even moved towns and yet he still stalks me.

[Twisted Sister]

it is my understanding that only two acts of stalking are required to arrest him for stalking, so ask the police this if they already have record of two or more acts.

You shouldn’t have to leave, he should have to leave, however, if the police won’t act quickly then your safety is of course paramount and urgent.

[Author]

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