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Has anyone else had this?
My support worker said she HAD to give them details because she was officially asked by the police to give them.
I know she was in a difficult position but I feel trust has now been completely breached.
The police are trying to meet me today, I’ve been warned they may show up but she doesn’t
have any more details until they do.
I’m scared what the hell are they trying to do?!?!? -
A referral to MARAC should be a positive thing. Can you call 101, speak to the Domestic Abuse team and relay your concerns? It’s a really frightening time. The police want to protect you. That’s why you’ve been referred to MARAC. It’s for your safety. The agencies are really worried about you. Hold tight.
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No it’s that I’ve been referred a few times already & the police have
said they want information direct from my IDVA advisor.
She said she’s never had to give information
to the police & was conflicted doing it.
She said they were looking into an investigation into him again.
I don’t want this all over again.
I’m terrified. It’s not like there’s been one explosive incident that should spark
an investigation, seems like they’re doing it off their own backs.
I just don’t know what the hell to do!
I don’t want to tell him but what am I supposed to do if they come for him again?? -
My ex was under investigation by the police for a long time before he knew about it. I was terrified of him knowing that I’d spoken to the police (on their advice). Ultimately they told me that they’d have to interview him and I had to make safety plans. It may be that you’re not the only person involved. The police didn’t charge my ex, but they did make him move out. They set the ball rolling. It’s not a ride that anyone would chose to go on, but there are so many people along the way to hold your back. Hard and chaotic as it is, please lean into those people. We are all here to listen and hold your back while you go through these hellish and difficult times. Your safety is paramount.
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Ive had my trust broken too many times before too. I know its scary. Its given me real trust issues even more now. They want to keep you safe but also now you fear telling peolle the truth incase they break confidentiality. I just keep it to myself now days. I hope they help you properly and safely. Keep posting here.
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This is the type of thing that really puts me off seeking help. I also had my trust broken in the past in relation to this.
I was somewhat honest with a professional about what was happening and this person then said they’d have to make a referral to SS. On the one hand, I understood why (because we have a child and they are bound to safeguard) but on the other hand it put me at such risk as I was living with him and suddenly there are people turning up at the door while he is there. It was so unsafe. Months later I got a phone call from the police (I guess something to do with Clare’s Law from the original referral)… they didn’t even ask if it was okay to take the call. He was there and heard it all. I had to cut the call by saying everything was fine etc when it wasn’t.
I think this is one of the reasons I have not felt able to ask for help as I am too scared of that happening again. The fact you don’t know what is going on in the background and the lack of control over the situation is very scary.
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