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    • #18917
      Gentlesoul
      Participant

      Hello, here I am again. I have been living with an abusive partner for (detail removed by moderator) years. That’s a long time isn’t it. I left him for (detail removed by moderator) months and lived in a refuge. I went back, thought he would change. He hasn’t. I have a mental illness which is difficult to live with and he just adds to it. He has done so much to ruin my life. Why can’t I break away? I have done Pattern Changing and read books. I am an intelligent woman. What is it that keeps me here? Well, after thinking about it, I think I am scared. I am scared of starting again at (age removed by moderator). Need so much to talk to someone,, can t go on like this.

    • #18926
      godschild
      Participant

      Hi, I have been with mine for decades and I have mental health issues, in the form of severe phobias that keep me trapped at the moment, so understand how you feel, they make our issues much worse
      I now see that mine has done a lot to ruin my life as well and its hard to face up to.
      Have you spoken to Womens aid, but talk on here it does help, share your feelings and experiences x*x

    • #18931
      KIP.
      Participant

      Hi, just to let you know I broke free after decades. It came down to the police and courts to get rid of him but I was brainwashed and programmed by him to think I could never survive on my own. I also did not recognise I was being abused. Everything was my fault etc. It was when I found women’s aid and realised he was the cause of my mental illnesses, he chose to behave the way he did and I would never ever recover from my mental illness when anywhere near him. Trauma bonding and stockholme syndrome were a huge part too. Maybe you could suggest a trial separation. You left for 6 months before so you know you can do it. I won’t say it’s been easy but it was definitely worth it. I have my freedom and my mental health is the strongest it’s been in years❤️

    • #19084
      Ayanna
      Participant

      Hi Gentlesoul, speak to WA again. Make a plan how you can change your life.
      Identify your fears. Then you can tackle them.
      It may appear scary to you to face life all on your own. Trust me it can be fun. It is not scary.
      We are all here for you!

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