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I confronted him about something the children told me. They said he had been making derogatory comments about me in front of them during contact. When I challenged him, he said they were lying. ‘Why I would I do that’ he said. I couldn’t give a flying fig what he thinks of me, but I expect him to keep it to himself when he’s with our children. They were confused and saddened by his words.
What disgusts me the most is that he would rather accuse our kids of lying than own up to it. Publicly, he wants everyone to believe he had the kids best interests at heart; privately, he’s doing the exact opposite.
Our eldest was sobbing earlier because he doesn’t want to spend time with his dad if it means he can’t be with me. He wants to know when his dad is going to die because he doesn’t want to spend the next ‘X’ years being forced to see him.
I’m sorry for the cr*ppy venting post, but does this get any easier?? How do I deal with the lies??
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No contact with him. Use a handover book that stays with the kids. You dont have to hear his lies. By confronting him, hes playing mind games with you. Hes going to lie and play games using the kids. My advice would be to go total no contact with him and just deal with what yours kids present to you. Use a third party for emails etc. It can be done. Dont waste your breath. Its never their fault❤️
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Mine says and does exactly the same, “why do you think I would upset my own child?” Uh, because that’s precisely why she doesn’t want to see you and why she’s hiding from you. Because you’ve been upsetting them for their whole lives. I’m afraid I can’t tell you that it gets better because he continues to behave this way, but my children grow in maturity and strength and they come to understand his ways. They are beginning to stand up for themselves. I’m so sorry your son is having to experience this from his father and I hope he’s of an age where he won’t have to suffer it too long. There is no point challenging our ex’s, it will always be our fault in their eyes. Save your energy for loving you and your son x*x
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