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    • #19997
      Moonflower1
      Participant

      and I’m trapped in hell forever.

      Despite telling him that I thought the relationship was beyond repair he managed to reel me in again with a mixture of guilt trips and intimidation.

      Denies everything, says I’m imagining it all.

      Please lovely ladies give me some hope that I won’t have to live like this forever.

    • #19999
      Starmoon
      Participant

      Hi moon flower. You situation sounds so much like mine. I’ve only just gotten out of my relationship (though it’s not over- he’s on bail and we have a baby together)
      I had no idea for so so long that I was in an abusive relationship, I just knew things were not rite. I came on here last year and I’m so so glad I did. Everyone is lovely and we all know how you feel. My abuser worked away, in other countries for days and weeks… He’d ignore me but if I did him then there was hell to pay. It’s is so so hard for things to become clear until you’ve had a solid amount of time away from him. Lots of ladies encouraged me time and time again to go no contact when he left me… And time and time again he always came back and wormed his way back in. Using the tactics you’ve mentioned or if I’d been strong and said no- he would then come back saying he’d realized he was in the wrong, he’d be so convincing and I believed him every time. I think in a way I always will. Lots of ladies kept telling me go no contact and the fog will clear but he never allowed me long enough away from him and I wasn’t strong enough not to fall for him. The abuse got worse and he got more physical so he was eventually arrested. Now he’s on bail and not allowed to contact me which is actually a blessing…. I’m finally able to let the fog clear and see him for what he is and genuinely for the first time ever- I hope he doesn’t come back. I’m glad it’s been taken out of my hands as I wasn’t that strong. So please find strength, anywhere you can, on here, with friend, family… The help line- anything. Read up as much as you can and try to find ways to get away from him. I know it’s not easy if you share a house and bills and have children but I read in a book (manipulated- hg tutor) write a list of all the obstacles stopping you from leaving… Like the house or finances and next to it put find a solution or stay in an abusive relationship for the rest of your life.
      I hope that helps. I know it’s far from black and white but we are all here for you xx

    • #20031
      godschild
      Participant

      Moonflower, I get told everyday that I imagine things, they won’t take any responsibilty for what they do at all and live in denial so have to project it onto US BY saying we imagine it or we are mental xx

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