How did you?

[Chocolatebunnie]

Without giving personal information can you lovely people make suggestions as to how people leave or if not leaving end the relationship.

I cannot leave our home has things we can’t leave behind.

I only recently split and he moved back in his doing not my wishes.

It feels like it will be very hard to do this all over again, it was so painful.

But I don’t want to hurt him or the kids, I know they’re better off in a happy home but I’ve spent decades with this man and despite everything I still care. I cannot hate anyone.

I’m also guessing this maybe more something to discuss with local support. Still not picked up the phone and I’m not sure why. I really should.

[Lottieblue]

CB have you spoken to a lawyer? This might be your next step. Speak to your local WA to see if they have recommendations – it’s essential to find someone who understands what you’re going through.
Once you know what your options are, you might find that you are able to think a little more clearly.

LB x*x

[Chocolatebunnie]

Yes you’re right, it’s not just my rights but protecting myself isn’t it?

After we reconciled this time I found out a few things he had hidden from me and I’m sure there’s more. So I guess this is not just legal advice but protection.

My heads still spinning from the past week, gradually things will fall into place. Sorry if I’m to ramble but it’s helping and so have you thank you x

[Lottieblue]

I’ve been through that headspin stuff, so many of us have. But once I had accepted that at some point I would need to leave him, and started doing little things to that end, every one of those little things really felt like it was getting me a step closer. So getting myself a different phone that he didn’t know about, setting up a new email address and sending myself emails within that account, by way of keeping a record. Speaking to Women’s Aid and to a lawyer. It felt a bit strange, as our marriage was carrying on as it always had been, but I was switching off my phone so he couldn’t trace me and looking over my shoulder before stepping off the street into the lawyer’s office etc and it felt so good! I hadn’t started leaving, but I had started making it easier for myself for when I did. I guess, at that stage, I was still in the hope that it wouldn’t come to that. That things would miraculously change (makes me laugh now, my naivety), but I knew that his control over me had to stop and I had to prove to myself that I was capable of determining my future.

[StrongLife]

It’s very difficult at first.

Did you try a domestic violence counsellor as well as good lawyer?

This is how I started. It’s not an easy road but years later I can see it was best road.

[Chocolatebunnie]

I’ve not tried this yet I guess it’s my next step.

Speaking with local WA today so hopefully I may see things clearer

[Author]

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