This topic contains 5 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  gettingtired 1 week, 1 day ago.

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  • #115317
     gettingtired 
    Participant

    Hello,.

    I really want to start talking to a counsellor/therapist but I’m not sure where to start. I need one who understands abuse and isn’t going to further confuse things or not help.

    Is anyone else seeing a counsellor specifically for the abuse? If so, what would you recommend?I’ve been told to go through my GP but I’m worried there will be a huge waiting list (although I’ll find out anyway in case there’s not). Otherwise I will have to pay myself but I’m wondering how you know who is going to be best?! I’ve had a look through a directory but there’s so many. If I’m paying I dont want to end up with someone who doesnt understand abuse and is just going to make me feel worse!

    Thanks in advance xx

  • #115318
     KIP. 
    Participant

    The BACP Register is a public record of counsellors and psychotherapists who meet or exceed our recommended minimum quality …

    I’d start here and find a local one then ask for a consultation where you can talk to them and ask all about their experience. Get a feel for them. Your local Women’s Aid May be able to recommend one. I have a local Domestic abuse charity that employs trained counsellors and it’s free, so ask around.

    • #115320
       gettingtired 
      Participant

      Thanks @kip, I will look at that register. Ideally I would not have to pay for it but unfortunately I dont have a local Women’s aid which is really annoying x

  • #115321
     KIP. 
    Participant

    My GP referred me privately because of the waiting list. I paid for 10 sessions which was worth it just to get me through a really bad patch. Look on the internet for anything domestic abuser related in your area that may have information. The doctors surgery sometimes have posters or information or your local MP may also know if there’s a local charity. I’ve also seen posters in hospitals advertising local agencies.

  • #115332
     Cecile 
    Participant

    In my experience the best therapist was a psychologist, trained a wide variety of approaches. You need someone who is trained in domestic abuse, PTSD, and preferably EMDR. I had counselling with a person centred integrative counsellor and it wasn’t good at all. One of the thing s women need to learn in these relationships is that they are victims of abuse. A lot of counsellors want to persuade you to NOT see yourself as a victim. The starting point has to be that they know where you are at mentally and be able to give you skilled advice and insights. I had to pay to see a psychologist in the end and she was brilliant.even down to giving me common sense advice like going to the police or she wouldn’t treat me.i could t see the full extent of the danger. She also did a really good risk assessment. Even now when the FOG descends and I start to feel guilty I think back to her assessment of my situation, and the police officer’s, and how serious they said it was. It was money well spent and I would not have got out with out these people. Even a few sessions with someone highly skilled is better than none.

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