Tagged: controlling, Photos, physically violent, Police
- This topic has 2 replies, 2 voices, and was last updated 1 year, 7 months ago by Twisted Sister.
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16th April 2023 at 3:20 pm #157692AnonymousInactive
Hi all, so the last time my partner was violent a few weeks ago, I took and saved photos of the bruises and other marks on my (detail removed by Moderator).
(detail removed by Moderator) he had a go at me for wearing (detail removed by Moderator) and said that I am going to spoil our (detail removed by Moderator) daughters as they will want to (detail removed by Moderator) so he forced me to (detail removed by Moderator). Despite the fact that he smokes weed. He said he is leaving and taking the kids when he can afford to. He won’t go by himself.
If I was to take the photos to the police, what is likely to happen? I just want him out of the house that I solely own because I don’t want to be with him. The police have been involved (detail removed by Moderator) before, (detail removed by Moderator).
I am not working at the moment due to (detail removed by Moderator) and do not qualify for legal aid. I don’t have any family that would support me and if I did end up being a single mother, I would need more money for legal fees and childcare.
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16th April 2023 at 3:26 pm #157694AnonymousInactive
Just to add a bit of humour, I have a vision of being free of him and wearing (detail removed by Moderator) every time I unfortunately have to encounter him just to stick it to him! 🤣
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16th April 2023 at 7:07 pm #157704Twisted SisterParticipant
Hi Ewemoon
Those photos in supporting a statement would be good evidence, presuming that the series of pictures can be validated as being you, taken at the time of the incident or thereabouts and are the types of bruise that are clearly the result of assault. I didn’t see the full detail of your message, but if your children were witness to this, its also abuse to them as witnesses, because of the harm it causes seeing their mother assaulted, its extremely distressing, and instils fear of the same happening to them.
If you report this it would be down to the police to charge him, submit it to the CPS for consideration, and to pursue him. You wouldn’t need a solicitor and you should get support as a victim of a crime.
As regards the house, you have every right to eject him on the basis of the assault, and the police can eject him also and make it a condition of his bail that he not return to your home. On the basis of the assault you could get a free non-mol by simply applying yourself through the .gov website which has all the information you need to complete it, and a worked example to demonstrate examples. Thats all free.
Whether he is there or not he will still be required to support his children financially.
If you are not currently working due to illness, or some kind of inability you would be entitled to benefit to support you, and help with childcare.
Make some calls around to find out your position as best you can to prepare the road ahead. Try organisations like Step-change for financial advice around your situation, and also Rights of Women, for legal advice, free, but be prepared to take a long time to get through, there are many needing these free helplines at the moment, so you have to keep trying.
I hope you can find your way through and keep asking around for all the advice and support you can get.
One thing I realised after was that I had always been a single mum, plus had an abuser to cope with.
Warmest wishes
ts
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