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Just had a strong knock on my front door.
I nearly fell off my chair. The anxiety kicked in immediately.
I hardly made it to the door, looked through the spy hole and saw a delivery man.
I shivered on my whole body when I unlocked the door and opened it …. All kinds of thoughts went through my brain, which letter is it? does the hell continue? …. and then it was a delivery from amazon that he handed me over.
Can you believe this?
I cannot live like this anymore. -
Some of these delivery men knock so hard and make you jump even if you havnt got issues they have no manners a lot of them
I went thro some time like this after I had, had so many police knocking the door the at the start of the year every loud knock made me terrified as they had been abusive to me and horrible, is awful how it affects you also one officer had a distinctive black beard who was assisting my husband to make himself the victim, every time now I see a black beard on TV or when out it makes me so anxious and scared , feel you pain and wish you could get some proper decent councelling x*x -
True its no way to live. I have a small amount of paranoia which I talk myself out of. I have to buzz people through twice and unlock my flat door. Good thing I can see and hear who I’m buzzing in.
Most of the time I’m expecting someone.
It does make me jump but not in the way you describe.
I don’t know what to suggest apart from reading loads about PTSD and practicing what coping skills the reading material suggest.
Practically wise maybe you could send deliveries to an Amazon pickup point or an Amazon locker.
A lot of supermarkets do click and collect these days.
Not much help though if it’s the TV licence people or the gas man.
Sometimes I don’t answer if I’m not expecting anyone.
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