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    • #118663
      Icandothis
      Participant

      Maybe it’s my fault my relationship failed especially with my ex been in his second relationship since we separated… and I still think to myself will he treat her any better than me? I know he put on a show for the last one at first but then she got rid of him. All kinds of things are going through my head x

    • #118664
      KIP.
      Participant

      It’s definitely not your fault. It takes two to make a relationship work a d he was never interested in a loving equal relationship. Nothing you could have done would have changed that. He did t want it to work. He wanted to abuse you to make himself feel good and he’s still doing it. Abuse robs us of our confidence. If you want to dominate someone you destroy their confidence and that’s what abusers do. It doesn’t matter how many relationships he has. They will always be based on the fact that he has to be top dog at everyone else’s expense. All that horror and trauma he out you through will be repeated in every subsequent relationship. My ex has a single mum with a child with disabilities and an ex husband who abused her and she has a medical condition. It’s extreme but you couldn’t get more vulnerable. Any contact with him is toxic and will keep you in that place in your head that he can have influence. Absolutely zero contact. You shouldn’t know anything about his life or what he’s doing. He should be a distant memory as you continue to concentrate on your life and forging ahead. Good riddance to bad rubbish x you’re a great mum and a good person and he’s a nasty selfish self centred toxic little man. You choose who you allow in your life and he should be the last person around you at this time when you’re vulnerable x they can smell vulnerability x

    • #118665
      Icandothis
      Participant

      Thankyou kip… that’s really helped me. Even his own family fear him including his own mother. X

    • #118668
      Eggshells
      Participant

      Definitely not your fault. If you read back through your posts, it is clear that no-one is able to form a healthy relationship with this man. No-one ever has and no-one ever will. Other women might be bluffed into having him in their lives initially but no-one will be able to make it last; least of all the man himself.

      There is absolutely nothing that you could have done to have made the relationship work. There is nothing that anyone can do. Leaving was your only option. xx

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