I Hate Him

[Serenity]

I hate his voice
I hate his arrogance
I hate his lies
I hate his empty eyes
I hate his stupid well honed bionic body- toned for destruction
I hate his turn of phrase
I hate his attitude
I hate his personality
I hate his big head
I hate his outlook
I hate his noise
I hate his empty speech
I hate his dominance
I hate his priorities
I hate his tactics
I hate his standards
I hate his warped morals
I hate his falsity
I hate his crudeness
I hate his flowery language
I hate his warped intelligence
I hate his attitude to sex
I hate his attitude to women
I hate his greed
I hate his cruelty
I hate his selfishness
I hate his glib charm
I hate his view of humanity
I hate how he uses the vulnerable.

[Ayanna]

Hugs, Serenity.

[Confused123]

Hi Hun

Has something happened ?

[KIP.]

Don’t waste your energy hating him. Pity him. Pitiful little men who will never know true happiness x

[Serenity]

Thank you, all. I had a bit of a private emotional meltdown last night. His ongoing attempts to affect me and my eldest seeing him again took its toll. I feel a bit better today X

[Bridget Jones Is Free]

Dear Serenity, I understand, we are bound to have melt downs, I am glad you feel better now, I think the time when you will feel free of hatred is when that feeling turns into indifference. I also think that it will only come more or less when the children are grown up and have their lives, or maybe if you find a nice partner who cares for you. Your energy will then direct itself to more positive feelings, the hurt will never be forgotten, it will lessen those moments when hatred inhabits your mind.
I am already indifferent to my husband because I lost interest in hoping he can realise anything. That doesn’t mean though that I am indifferent to the on going developments my family is going through.
My hell is not finished. Trust your new life, the evil is behind, close the door and find your new happiness, but keep the ghosts at bay…

[Ayanna]

I think you should actively try parental alienation. He abuses you and the kids, pay it back. Be nasty. There seems to be no other option.

[Serenity]

Hi Bridget,

I have felt indifferent for months but suddenly these feelings of anger have arisen.

Maybe I need to go through them. Apparently, anger is part of the grief cycle. I was always scared of feeling angry, but I think acknowledging our anger is a good thing. It’s what you do with the anger that’s important. Being destructive isn’t good- channeling the energy into something positive, I suppose is.

I think I try to be too goody two-shoes about the whole thing. He never allowed me to be angry. Well, now I can! Thank you for your kind words.

Ayanna- yes, I am somewhat tactical in my reactions to him and in what I say and do to the kids. I am aware that he might use certain things as ammunition, so I try to keep one step ahead. Thank you. You are a real fighting spirit, and I need to allow myself to be a bit more like that! Xx

[Falling Skys]

Hi serenity

Melt down your words are so wise and true, I thankyou for voicing them. I will if you don’t mind print it out. It affirm how awful and alike they are.

Hugs FS xx

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