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These sensations I’m getting below my waist are constant. Oh my god I need to say it somewhere because it’s driving me insane, making me feel…….there’s only one way to describe what’s happening and I can’t say it in front of someone knowing its happening right then…… I can’t say it but I know it’s the inprint left after years of sex abuse 🤮😢
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Trigger Warning sex reference
Whatever you’re feeling as you say is a result of the abuse. It’s biological and mental and if it’s beyond your control just now can you try some distraction techniques? Perhaps admitting it will help your brain to process it. Maybe it’s your brain working through the trauma. All sorts of weird things happened to me including waking up running out the front door in a panic in my night cloths. I think it was the snow that woke me up otherwise I could have been wandering the streets. I had to put parcel tapes on the locks when I went to bed. I also orgasmed during rape and if that’s what you’re feeling then it’s nothing to be ashamed of. I’m trying to say your brain will go off in all directions trying to reconcile the abuse so don’t be ashamed. It’s not your shame.
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Keeping secrets really does make things worse. I’m sure it happens to many victims. Perhaps you could write it down and then tear it up. You’re absolutely right about hypersensitivity. It’s only right it will affect all parts of the body. My hearing and eyesight have become extremely sensitive so why not other parts. It’s just biology x if you’re worried perhaps you could ring your GP. Can you try mindfulness or get out walking with your music in your ears. Change where your mind is at x
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I think I told her. She must be sick to death of my contrariness. I asked her to get it out of me. She didn’t really want to do that but there was no other way. I’m going to have to build myself up just say it next week. I think you are so right that it’s the secrecy of it all that’s keeping me down. She’s helping me to get the sensations in my body down. It seems completely ludicrous to me that anyone would behave the way I am now 🤯
I need to write down what you said earlier kip but about myself. Once I know what it is that’s wrong I feel insane until I’ve got over it. That’s why I need to get it over with as soon as possible 🤮 -
Don’t put pressure on yourself, you’re already under enough. Perhaps talk to her like a third party. You could say I once heard about a girl who such and such happened to…………. Well, that’s happening to me. For a long time I would talk in a strange way like it happened to someone else. It puts a safe barrier there. Just take baby steps x
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Good evening Freedomfries01,
I just wanted to let you know that these sensations you are describing are normal.
As KIP mentioned, it is a biological and psychological response to trauma and nothing you are feeling is wrong, although it may feel incredibly confusing and conflicting.It is such a difficult journey getting to feel like your body belongs to you again after sexual abuse, and it’s important to be patient and kind to yourself.
I’d encourage you to try and open up about this with your therapist. You could also contact Rape Crisis if you’d prefer to talk about it anonymously: https://rapecrisis.org.uk/
Take care,
Lisa -
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Hey, you’re doing really great. Be your own best friend and use any trick of the mind that gets you forward to the next stage. Are you looking after yourself. It’s important to eat and drink and try to rest. Try mindfulness. Takes practice but it’s a great distraction. Try writing three things each day that you’re grateful for. Any funny favourite films that gets a smile. Any favourite jokes or funny memories. You’ve been framed got a laugh out of me. It’s important to force your thought process to positive things where you can x
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