4th June 2021 at 12:11 am #126638[email protected]@@Participant
Apologies for mistakes!
He’s on bail condition-he tried to contact me wit his mum help,than he tried to call me-I ignored him all the time!in weeks time when I didn’t see him I started overthinking “what of its my fault I made him to be like this with me?”
Shortly about our relationship-been together for many years not married got two kids
Oldest not sure what side she wants to be because she’s a bit scared from him, younger she loves both of us!
We are arguing every single day for every,every single thing is my fault-can’t find something in the house-my fault because I must move somewhere else,can’t find socks-my fault!
He’s got his business and I m kind of working with him,everything is wrong what I do about work! And he come back from work he doesn’t like my food ,shouting and arguing! Like this it’s been at least (detail removed by Moderator) years before was more less ok!he hit me few times- apologies after I always forgive him!verbal abusing o my Goodness I can’t even explain-he’s say anything everything about past my work my family my friends calling me names-destroying me.. I m sorry I just can’t explain my feelings .
I reported him to police he can’t come to my house or contact me …till bail condition ends.but he did contact me because I felt sorry for him no because I love him just like humanity! He’s said so nice things promised me so much-never will be like before !
I so stupid so stupid….
He asked me to withdraw my statement from police he called me every day after I first answered him!he tried to be nice (detail removed by Moderator) days and than O God same thing-same talking calling names! I m so stupid!I told him I will withdraw the statement if you will leave me alone because I won’t be with you anymore! He won’t listen-he just won’t listen to me
Just said will be different this time!
This will never ever change!
I don’t know what to do! What will happen when bail conditions ends I have no idea what police will do! Because I m scared now to tell police I have been contacting him!
I did call police to ask if they can withdraw my statement,but they didn’t answer clearly what will happen! I m so confused and so hate myself because I did believed him again! Help any advice……..
4th June 2021 at 10:40 am #126653tiredanddrainedParticipant
Don’t hate yourself for trying to give someone a chance and wanting to see the good in them. It’s a common thing and he is the 1 with the bail condition not to contact you so don’t you be worried about the police. If you tell them what you wrote here they would understand.
It was like reading about my abusive partner in your message. I asked him to leave and packed his stuff (detail removed by Moderator) days ago and the reason he got abusive at (detail removed by Moderator) was because he couldn’t find a clean pair of socks for work. He never even told me he needed stuff washed. The fact he expects me to do his washing when he is an adult is bad enough but now im meant to be a mind reader and look his stuff out for work. Its like the more i do the more ungrateful he is and the more he expects it. He started screaming F****N JOKE then comes in screaming when im sleeping in bed swearing snd shouting. The more i said please stop shouting the neighbours are sleeping the loder he got. He started calling me a F****N B*****D. It is so embarrssing my neighbours getting woken up to this. Just (detail removed by Moderator) weeks ago my neighbour complained his anger is affecting her wee boy and he is crying and saying he is frightened. I told my partner then if he yells and swears again he will need to leave the home. He said ge wouldn’t and this is his (detail removed by Moderator) outburst in (detail removed by Moderator) weeks. When i told him to leave he ran at me and pushed me across the room full force. I had to thresten him with police so he would leave.
After all this the strange this is i miss the good side of him. He has condtantly texted saying he is sorry and he loves me and if i loved him i wouldn’t give up on him. It is hard but i wanted to pointout the conflicted feelings you are having is completely normal as you are hoping for his loving side to stay and the other verbally abusive disrespectfull side to dissapear. Without help it won’t happen. – is he getting any help for his issues? Mines hasn’t. He has w**d addiction, gambling and takes coccaine the odd time after promising me countless times he wont ever take it again. I don’t take drugs. He says he’s not going to a doctor to condosend him. I think going to a doctor is the only way the behaviour could change but they don’t seem to want to. Sorry about telling you so much about my own story. I feel your pain though. x*x
4th June 2021 at 5:09 pm #126671[email protected]@@Participant
That’s the point-you have to be mind reader,otherwise you will not good enough!i m do with you to be honest and I thought just me like this kind of relationship!
The only thing he’s using is alcohol a lots of alcohol! On the the day he tried to contact me he stopped drinking(it’s (detail removed by Moderator) ago ) he’s coming to house like nothing happened just keep asking me how you could do that I do everything for you and kids! He’s working I would say yes a lot but like I said to him I don’t need big house or expensive thing I literally happy to live in 3 bedroom house just peaceful please! He’s just running after money all life! I m so down every single day!wake up in morning when he’s home it’s like nightmare! Never know what will happen what he will say to make me feel worse! When I sit down on sofa he always goes is everything done you don’t need to do anything?
I didn’t work a year because of lockdown! Back now but I can’t concentrate for work!
I give him chance and he not changed! Shoul I report him again? He’s got another (detail removed by Moderator) on bail condition! He even took the house key!
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