- This topic has 8 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 4 months ago by Anabela.
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29th January 2017 at 8:00 pm #37051AnabelaParticipant
For the very first time, I put the phone down on him. He was screaming at me on a phone, shouting, saying I am useless (detail removed by moderator). I told him this is enough. and cut the call. And switched off my phone. Now I am sitting shaking on my bed, because I know it has made him really angry…..
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29th January 2017 at 8:23 pm #37056AyannaParticipant
Well done. Next time tell him to (removed by moderator) before you cut the call.
Do not fear him.
You did the first step to free yourself.
I am proud of you. -
29th January 2017 at 8:31 pm #37058AnabelaParticipant
I still can’t believe I actually did it.
I have never done that before. I bet in the morning, it will be loaded with messages full of hatred.
but it feels like a step towards freedom.
But now I get this grieving mood – I still love him 🙁 I just wanted to be a family with him…. I thought he was a good man. with a kind heart… who would never want to hurt me… -
29th January 2017 at 8:48 pm #37062AyannaParticipant
Anabela, there will be another. The world is full of useless men. Choose the most harmless among them. They are fools anyway. But you need one who does things for you and treats you like a queen whatever you do. Someone who sees you as perfect even when you do not shower or comb your hair.
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29th January 2017 at 8:54 pm #37063LyriaTwilightParticipant
Well done. He won’t like it, but you don’t need worrying about that. It isn’t your duty to keep him happy. And you don’t have to listen to abuse over the phone.
As for grieving him – that is natural. Of course you went into the relationship feeling positive and wanting him to treat you well. That is what most people want, and what they deserve. Including you. One day, you will find someone who knows your worth and treats you accordingly x -
29th January 2017 at 9:03 pm #37065AnabelaParticipant
Thank you…
It’s hard to see how conditional his ‘love’ is. I dont earn enough, my job is not good enough… In his eyes i do nothing to change my situation.
Like I have to meet the threshold so that I could be in this relationship…
I hope I hope I hope I will be strong and will not beg to be ‘forgiven’ and loved…… -
29th January 2017 at 9:39 pm #37071SerenityParticipant
Wow- you did it!
Doesn’t it feel great to take your power back?
Well done x
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30th January 2017 at 8:30 am #37101Confused123Participant
well done hun, this is the next step to u getting stronger
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30th January 2017 at 11:37 pm #37154AnabelaParticipant
the thing is, i dont feel i got any power back. now i feel i am at risk!!!!!!!!!!
i had a horrible day. he came all the way to my house last night. i was too scared to ignore him, i did not want a scene. i thought he wanted to talk. and i got into his car.WHY????????? Because i was scared. ANd while we were driving I thought we are actually gonna die. He did say, maybe we should die together. I was all shaking.
all day today, i spent with him. listening how much he hates me, my family. How useless I am. I dont even care about that bit. but when he SCREAMS how much he HATES me. When he calls my MUM names!!!!!!!!
In the end he said he WISH I DIE. he did threatened to kill me at some point as well.
I am scared. I dont want to involve police, because I think they would be powerless. no restraining order would stop him, if he wanted to take a revenge.
i might be overeacting and all his words might be empty.
but the truth is – I AM SO SO SCARED. i dont want him. i can deal with that love thing later. but i want to be alive.
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