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Giving him such a blasting but then what good will it do? Looked back on some messages from beginning. He said he wanted friendship no lies. And someone for his daughter. He turned out to be a compulsive liar. When i challenged him over lying he said everyone lies. And he said ok il stop lying. Oh boy how simple were i???? He were going to play football and everything in beginning never happened. Texting women all the way through accusing me of seeing other men. Sorry for ranting on but im so b****y angry i let him do it id done 2 freedom programmes previous too xx
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Hi Icandothis,
I am sorry that you have been having a stressful time. Please try to remember there is a difference between being fooled and being a fool. You are definitely not a fool, all you have done is believe in someone and trust that they were a good person. Please get plenty of support from your local Women’s Aid group and you can phone the helpline any time you want to talk too.
Best wishes,
Lisa
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Hi There,
You’re not a fool. Because you’re a decent person, you trusted, imagining that he had the same morals as you. And these manipulators are great at pretending to be someone they are not at first.
I think you found out pretty early what he was like, or your you began to question things at least. You didn’t automatically blame yourself, andvyou questioned things a lot.
This means that your ‘jerk radar’is indeed improving! It also shows that you’ve come a long way in realising that abusers’ behaviours are not automatically your fault. I think you’ve come a long way, even if it doesn’t seem like it to you.
It’s really interesting that he said that everyone lies.
I really do think that these abusers believe- or excuse themselves by telling themselves – that everyone lies, they everyone is like them.
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