- This topic has 8 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 1 month ago by peachycuteness1.
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4th April 2024 at 9:00 pm #167508peachycuteness1Participant
Ive been on here a few times, I left my abuser. However, one night I had a drink, he came round. We had intercourse and no protection was used. I took the morning after pill, he is also on bail, and recently got a non-molestation order. I feel like a right idiot. I took a test today, and im pregnant. What the hell do i do? Im scared im going to loose my family, my son…Yes abortion would be ideal. But ive done it before and even miscarried and I feel awful for aborting. I feel so lost. Im so scared, i cant t tell family as they will just call me an idiot for seeing him again, especially because hes on bail and got a restraining order. Hes tried to convince me he wants to get help and he will change. If i told the social services, would they stay involved and see if he will get help? Will they take my kid? IDK WHAT TO DO.
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4th April 2024 at 10:38 pm #167520peachycuteness1Participant
I’ve decided to get rid of the baby. It’s the best option. & im going to stay away from him. I need to focus on myself…
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4th April 2024 at 11:35 pm #167522Stargazing1Participant
@peachycuteness1 , its heartbreaking to hear what is going on for you. All these stories here are heartbreaking. My heart goes out to you 💓. We are always torn between something and it’s so hard to know what’s best to do . Mistakes are made by us as humans all the time . We leave them , we go back . We stay with them they ruin things for us . We stay they make our lives miserable. They hurt us so much . We leave them they still cause chaos. I’m.so terribly sorry your in the situation you are in . I wish nothing but good times ahead once you have dealt with this awful situation. Please please please take care of yourself that’s the most important thing to do . Sending lots of hugs.
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5th April 2024 at 12:23 pm #167549peachycuteness1Participant
I know. It’s my own fault. But idk if I can go through with an abortion. As I’ve said, I’ve miscarried, and aborted before and I felt ever so bad. I’ve always wanted another baby, but it’s with someone who isn’t stable. I don’t doubt he isn’t a good dad, as he’s got kids from previous relationships and the baby mum has always said he’s a good father. But I know he isn’t right for me.
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5th April 2024 at 12:26 pm #167550peachycuteness1Participant
And do I want a baby father who abuses? Manipulates. I’d never get him out of my life. My family would instantly hate me. I’m in a mess. But I know im still a mum to my little bit and he needs me. I love him and don’t want to loose him. So I’ve decided to stay off the drink. When I drink I make stupid decisions.
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5th April 2024 at 9:21 am #167528lover of no contactParticipant
Hi peachycuteness1,
My heart goes out to you dealing with this on your own. Please keep posting and reaching out for support. I am praying for you and your baby -
5th April 2024 at 4:44 pm #167552MumofcatsParticipant
Hi Peachy
It’s such a c****y situation. There’s no right or wrong decision.
Actually, the best decision is the one that will keep you and the child you already have safe from abuse.Whether you do go ahead with the abortion or not, ask where you could some counselling. It will help you manage all the emotions, thoughts and feelings you have regarding the whole situation.
Let us know how you are.
Take care and stay safe. Xx
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5th April 2024 at 8:25 pm #167560peachycuteness1Participant
I know what I need to do. I need to keep myself and my son safe. It would be selfish for me to keep this baby as it won’t be easy, and my son never asked for this. So it’s best if I get rid. & stay clear from him.
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5th April 2024 at 4:51 pm #167553LisaMain Moderator
Hi peachycuteness1,
I’m very sorry to hear of your situation. Understandably you are feeling emotionally overwhelmed and unsure how to move forward.
Don’t hesitate to call your local domestic abuse service. Explain what has recently happened and how you are feeling. They will understand and with no judgement be able to provide a bit of emotional support and guidance, so you can get some clarity and feel less isolated in all this. You may also want to approach your GP and see what support there is for you. They may be able to help themselves or signpost you to a specialist local service.
Try and keep in mind, abusive men do not make good fathers. They cannot act abusively towards the mother of their own child and yet somehow never bring out these traits while raising their child. Abuse towards the mother means indirect or direct abuse towards a child.
I know this is a highly sensitive, difficult time, so I hope you are able to get some extra support via your local domestic abuse service. Also do keep posting here. You are not alone.
Take care,
Lisa
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