I think he let himself in the house

[puzzledatlife]

After my ex moved out I changed the lock. However I lent him my key once because he had nowhere to go.
Weeks after I was away. He had forgotten something in the house and asked to let himself in. He didn’t have the key and I was away. He said he could remove the window and let himself in. I refused. This resulted in a big rage on his part (me refusing to agree that he cut the window frame to go in).
This made me think he did not make a copy of the key. Also he is not very forward thinking. I don’t think he is the kind of man who would think…right I will make myself a copy as at some point it will come handy.
After that I kept receiving some mail addressed to him. When we were in touch i would inform him and post it in his new place.
There were (detail removed by moderator) envelopes. He said these were about (detail removed by moderator).
I kept receiving his mail which I always stored in the same place. (detail removed by moderator) i went to collect this mail from the usual drawer where I put it because I intended to post it all to him. Have been busy and away for a few weeks so hadn’t gone round to do it but he hasn’t asked either so I thought ok I’ll do it when I am back.
Went to pick the post and I found the (detail removed by moderator) letters had disappeared. (detail removed by moderator) other mails were there but not the (detail removed by moderator) ones.
I checked the windows if there is sign of cut but there is not that I can see.
However I know for a fact that there were the (detail removed by moderator) envelopes in the pile of the mail to post him and these are not there.
We are in a legal dispute in which he has made allegations that are extremely bad but all false and very easy to dismiss. Actually stupid false because they are fully easy to prove lies. For example (removed by moderator) Lots of other things like these which I have messages and emails to prove they are lies.
I begin to think that there is something running under this thing…something that perhaps those (detail removed by moderator) letters contained. I am not sure what to do. I don’t want to accuse him of trespass when I can’t prove it. Also the dispute is around the kids and I don’t want to play the game he’s playing of being nasty and say awful stuff about him. However how he’s playing (detail removed by moderator) is just nasty and awful and I am convinced that there is something behind all of this. Not sure what this is. Should I mention this to my solicitors?

[Iwantmeback]

Hi there, if certainly mention this to your solicitor. Obviously without proof you can’t involve the police, unless a neighbour saw him going in when you are away! I’d go with your gut on this, you’re no longer under his spell, he isn’t gaslighting you, so you know what you saw. You did not imagine those envelopes😏 to be on the safe side, get the locks changed again or put a bolt on the door and go out the back way. But to be ultra safe, get new locks for all doors.ask the police about cameras for your home, I’m not sure if WA can advise or help with this too.
You’re doing really well, don’t let him get to you🙂

IWMB 💕💕

[KIP.]

Trust your gut. You could call his bluff. Txt and say he was seen entering your home and you have already told him not to and you want the key back. There men are pathological liars. Mine too lied time and time again. Lies that he must have known I could prove but it didn’t stop him. This will be his downfall. Keep a journal and eventually he will be so discredited no one will believe a word he says. Definitely mention to solicitor and if he confesses on txt I would involve police. You have a right to be safe.

[puzzledatlife]

Thanks both. Trying to get an answer would be good.
However the moment he blocked me from all contact because I have initiated a dispute resolution around the kids.
I have no way of contacting him and I think that if I wrote to him that his mail has disappeared he would deny it and accuse me of being malicious.
The envelopes were definitely there. They were of a specific type and colour. (Detail removed by moderator). I will mention this to the solicitor and call the helpline here too.
He definitely told me, in a message, time ago, that he was capable of breaking in into my house without leaving trace of it. He said that in another context…He wanted to retrieve some of his things while I was away on holiday. However he said he could do it very easily. I did look but there is no sign of breaking in…and yet he must have gone in and deliberately taken only those specific letters leaving the other mail addressed to him in the pile. Kip you are right in the process of this case I am noticing how many lies ha has said…but lies of such an obvious obvious nature that is unclear to me how he thinks he’s getting away with them.xx

[Flowerchild]

Puzzled, darling, Iwantmeback is right to say you need to change the locks again!

And, if you can stretch to it, I’d be inclined to install CCTV too. A security camera, or better still cameras! – covering the window in question and other entrances would be a very strong deterrent to further intrusions. I don’t doubt for a moment that he’s been in; however else did those letters vanish? But he’s hoping to make you look like a liar or a madwoman because it’s deniable. Cameras will make it undeniable. The cameras don’t even need to catch him, do they? They just need to deter him.

Imagine the peace of mind knowing he can’t sneak around any more. Worth the cost?

Flower x

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