To be friends with him on and of after I seperated.I could manage to be civil with him but only for a short time as when I looked at him it all came back what he did. And I just wanted to throttle him and real hatred ran through my body. Has anybody else experienced this? X
I never tried to be friends with mine. I was civil and I hoped and prayed he would be a good parent to the kids and there very briefly was a flash of fancying him again during one handover.
My new inner voice that I was now listening too thought I was nuts. Then as the blinkers fell away as I looked at him the ugliness of his true being shone through.
That is the way I have seen him ever since when he has been putting on the nice charm.
As for wanting to throttle him and hatred. I would let that work off in dreams or when I was running or doing a hard workout or my physio exercises. Never in front of him or the children. I became very fit at one point.