It’s that I can only count on myself to improve my family situation.
I nevertheless thank all the supportive people around me, this Forum, etc. But in the end, it is all up to me to show immense strength.
It’s just that sometimes it’s like there is no hope. That’s when I need to double my high spirits. It’s hard. But I get there, I am a permanent optimist, somehow I think…
And let go of any self-doubt that you are not a strong, courageous woman. You can do this, you can break free from your abusive relationship, just keep trying one day at a time to do one small thing towards leaving the abusive relationship. I know it sounds silly but decluttering my possessions was me engaging in the process of leaving. If I didn’t have so much ‘stuff’ then maybe it would be easier to let go and leave. Saying that I too couldn’t (or chose not ) to leave my home (he was trying to get me out using bullying behaviour), but I too couldn’t leave my teenage children and youngest child. I did beg God to do it for me and a week after me begging on my knees my way out occurred when my abuser sent me a legal letter looking for a separation.
Maintain hope. Trust there will be a way out of the abusive relationship for you and your children.