- This topic has 16 replies, 7 voices, and was last updated 6 months, 2 weeks ago by
Hazydayz.
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16th July 2024 at 9:37 am #169859
Hazydayz
ParticipantI’ve been away from here for some time, I know this is the only support I have, I guess I’m here again seeking that support because I’ve registered to myself once again! I’m at the crossroads of my life, wondering which way now?
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17th July 2024 at 10:03 am #169895
Lisa
Main ModeratorHi Hazydayz,
I’m glad that you come back and use this space for support when you need. I hope that you find sharing support here with other women to be helpful at this time.
Take care and keep posting,
Lisa -
17th July 2024 at 6:56 pm #169904
nbumblebee
ParticipantHey Hazy days. How are you doing sweetie?
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21st July 2024 at 4:32 pm #169976
Moongazer
ParticipantHi Hazydayz
Think I am probably in the same boat as you! Have recently left an abusive relationship and am looking for some support. Friends are thin on the ground these days. Have reached that crossroads and turned down the single life lane. But not sure where that lane will take me. It’s a bit scary and can feel lonely too.
Let’s hope we both find what we need to help us along.
Sending you lots of strong, positive thoughts.
Moongazer
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26th July 2024 at 2:49 pm #170122
Hazydayz
ParticipantHi Moongazer, nice to meet you, how you doing? Thanks for your reply and strong positive thoughts, very much appreciate them. Lucky you! Your out of the abusive relationship you were in, but its not plain sailing is it I guess, I’m at the crossroads of my life, waiting for someone to come along and point me in the direction that will help me get away from being stuck at the crossroads. I do hope we find our way home, wherever that will be? Sending you lots of strength and positive thoughts too
Hazydayz💞
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27th July 2024 at 11:59 am #170163
Moongazer
ParticipantHi Hazydayz
It has taken a long time for me to reach the point you talk of; when you feel like you have been pointed in the right direction.
For me, it has taken over a year of therapy to reach an understanding where I know I have to get out or I’ll just keep going around in the same awful cycle.
You are right; it’s not plain sailing. And I keep having wobbles and tears. There are weak moments, where I feel like I just want to talk to him again. But, so far (this time at least), I have managed to stay no contact. And once the ‘urge’ passes, I feel pleased that I managed it.
I’m a long way from being home, and I don’t know where that will be. But it surely has to be better than being in the relationship I was in.
Look after yourself.
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28th July 2024 at 9:50 am #170194
Hazydayz
ParticipantHi Moongazer, one step at a time eh? Keep walking in the right direction for you. I guess if you can do that your almost home and dry. Keep looking forward! Look after you
Hazydayz💞
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26th July 2024 at 3:07 pm #170124
Littlepixie
ParticipantHi everyone. I’m not long out of my marriage either. I’d been thinking about it for years but now reality has kicked in. I’m lonely, sad and just wish this hadn’t have happened. I feel like my life is just one big failure after another. I keep thinking it’s all in my head & it wasn’t that bad.
This forum has been such a help reading other people’s stories & going through similar x-
27th July 2024 at 8:27 am #170156
Hazydayz
ParticipantHello Littlepixie, you are where I’m not yet, out of it! Although I do understand the feelings you express of being lonely and sad maybe in time that will be replaced by relief and opportunity to find yourself in a happier relationship, when your healed and truelly ready. The only thing I can say as someone who understands but is still there, remind yourself of the loneliness and sadnness of being back there in it. The waking up is a devastating experience! Not in your head! But is an education sadly! Don’t you think? Love is like a lottery it feels, some lucky winners, and many losers. Take care of yourself.
Hazydayz💞
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28th July 2024 at 2:20 pm #170203
Karisqq
ParticipantLove it when you say love’s like a lottery, there’re win and lose. I think that’s applicable to every relationships, and in fact everything. Losing doesn’t mean that we’re a failure, it’s just that we all have to learn how to lose and fall, and to stand up and move on! As long as we have the courage to start anew, there’ll always be Sth waiting for us, and that’s the wonder of life. Sending you lots of love x
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29th July 2024 at 8:28 am #170221
Hazydayz
ParticipantYou make very good sense, I agree we are not failures we just feel sometimes like we are going through what others don’t seem to be in the outside of here world. Lots of love to you too x
Hazydayz💞
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27th July 2024 at 12:06 pm #170165
Moongazer
ParticipantHi Littlepixie
I read your post about feeling like a failure, and it really resonated with me.
I think this site is so useful for helping us to realise we are not the only one who feels the way we do.
I also feel like I’ve failed at life. I haven’t managed to have what I would consider a successful relationship with a man at all in my life. In fact, I think I’ve nearly given up. Although being single forever is a scary thought for me. But, I think one of my problems is that I’ve not been single for more (detail removed by Moderator) weeks since I was (detail removed by Moderator). And it’s time for me (at the age of (detail removed by Moderator)!) to spend some time alone.
I hope you are managing to stay strong and safe. I’ve been out of my (detail removed by Moderator) year abusive relationship since (detail removed by Moderator), and I’m still struggling with an emotional rollercoaster going on in my head. Sometimes feeling pleased with myself for finally getting away, but a lot of the time feeling very low and sad. Its difficult, isn’t it?
Take care. Sending positive thoughts to you.
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27th July 2024 at 8:53 pm #170181
Karisqq
ParticipantI’m glad to hear that you’re back to the forum. It may be hard for you to process everything after leaving that abusive relationships, but good job anyway! Throughout the process you may find yourself having lots of difficult emotions, for me acceptance is the key, accept those emotions, wait them pass, they’ll pass eventually, and do things make you feel good and focus on those good feelings. Please take care of yourself and don’t be hard on yourself since you’re the most qualified person to love yourself x
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28th July 2024 at 10:05 am #170195
Hazydayz
ParticipantHi Karisqq
Just want to say, we’ll done to you. You inspire with your clarity and show you are a survivor. Continue to be kind to yourself you deserve it.
Hazydayz💞
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28th July 2024 at 2:22 pm #170204
Karisqq
ParticipantThanks for your kind word. I think the hardest bit is to empower yourself, empower others seems easier, but I guess it’s the lesson for us to learn, to learn to love and be kind to ourselves. Meanwhile I’m flying back to (detail removed by Moderator) to face my family (detail removed by Moderator); it’s scary, since there are some abusive bits, but I’ll look forward to come back to U.K. again to continue my life.
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28th July 2024 at 3:37 pm #170206
Stargazing1
ParticipantHello @Hazydayz , sending gentle hugs. The support here hopefully will make you feel a little better. Wishing you wasn’t in this situation. Keep safe 🙏 ❤️.
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