Im just so ugly.

[Loose]

Im really having a hard time, everyday i look at myself in the mirror and all i see is a fat, saggy and worthless mess, i look so ugly in anything i wear and worse when i dont!

[Hazydayz]

I have just seen what you posted, I don’t know your story? But, it saddens me to see your pain. Don’t look in the mirror everyday and judge yourself. Cruel people and abusers may have caused you to judge yourself? And, Society expects us all to look perfect, but none of us is perfect in reality. Living perfect lives. Life and unhappiness takes its toll on the wounded. Look to the inside of you and find what kindness Lies there, be kind to yourself❤️

[Loose]

Your very kind to say that but i just feel so low in myself, i just feel i look so gross and ugly

[Hazydayz]

Hi again, I’m sorry, I missed seeing your previous post. I see what your going through. I understand why you feel so low in yourself, find that kindness and love for yourself and stop this happening.sending you love and hope💕

[Ariadne]

Hi @Loose,

This must be really difficult for you to live with… You are now putting yourself down, and it is not something that you can easily change. There is a thought stopping technique in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) that basically suggests to question those thoughts. For example, you go from a belief like “I look ugly” to “I have many good qualities, I like my eyes”, etc. So trying to disprove and change your thought pattern. Online I found this way of explaining it: Say “Stop!” when you experience a recurring thought, either aloud or to yourself. Negate the bad thought in a positive way, by exchanging the negative thought for a positive one. Replace “I cannot…” or “I will not…” with “I can…” or “I will…”.

Another good way to go about it is writing something good about you every day. It doesn’t have to start with your looks if you don’t feel comfortable with it. But just write a sentence about something you like about yourself. Something like “I like how I am able to do this [insert task] well”, or “I am a generous person”. Simultaneously, you can also start trying to notice something you’re grateful for every day, like the flowers blooming outside. This starts shifting your thoughts from negative to positive. Then the next step is trying to identify what makes you feel good, and keep doing it. If it’s singing, for example, but you notice you don’t sing anymore… then start trying to sing a bit every day. It might feel weird at first, but sometimes we need to start doing what makes us happy before we are in the happy mode. It kind of tricks our brain into thinking we are ok to feel happy now.

Take care of yourself!

[Author]

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