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I did it! I left. All the kids are with me, we are staying somewhere safe, he’s looking for somewhere to live so we can return home. I feel like a nomad, but I’m able to go to bed and wake up without any pressure for sex. I’ve had wine without worrying I’ll let my guard down. The kids have felt able to do normal stuff like play music, watch tv, eat a family meal, all without criticism or shouting, it’s been remarkable really. Watching how normal and well behaved they really are, and how relaxed without him around, despite us being away from home. It’s only the start, but I am sure I’ve done the right thing.
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I am so glad. I would maybe try writing down a list of all the reasons that you are glad you are out – to remind you on the days you waver, as well as the widely recommended and really useful list of abusive incidents which can be really useful to stop you returning. Sounds like you are motivated by the positives though, so a positives list could be the very thing.
I assume you are still in contact with your ex about the house, and maybe can’t go no contact yet, but definitely try to keep contact to a minimum and only about practicalities not feelings.
Good luck with your abuse free life! Well done again for leaving. Keep posting if you need support.
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Hey supermum, well done. In my experience he is going nowhere. If he wanted to leave he wouldn’t have let you and your children move out. He would have gone by now. I think you should get some legal advice. Ring Rights for Women who offer free legal advice. Don’t let your guard down and don’t believe a word he says. I’m glad you’re enjoying your freedom, just remember how good it feels x
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