- This topic has 12 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 3 years, 2 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
-
-
Oh Minimrs, my heart goes out to you. I can imagine that you must feel really hopeless.
Please contact womens aid, the national domestic abuse helpline and your GP. They will be able to help you find the support you need. I’m sure there is a way out. It must be very common for abuse to cause behaviours that the abuser uses against us in relation to the kids. In my case I go a bit mad with anxiety. But there is help and support out there. Things might not be nearly as bad as they seem. Please try to be kind to yourself and recognise that you’re coping the best way you can right now. That doesn’t mean you won’t stop drinking, it just means that with your current support level at this point in time it’s how you’re coping. You’ve already taken a big, brave step by posting here. Just reach out a bit further.
Sending love xxxx
-
He’s a liar and a manipulator. You can get help for your drinking and you’re probably only drinking to cope around him. Once you get out, all that can be sorted. He cannot take your children. Only a court can do that and social service can help you. He’s a liar and he will say anything to keep you under his control x
-
-
-
-
-
-
No. They won’t take your children. If you need help they will give you help. Unless you’re a danger to your children which I’m sure you’re not. Abuse thrives on silence. Are you in touch with your local women’s aid? They can support you too. It sounds like it’s your husband/partner that needs removed. Many people drink alcohol and can function perfectly well. It’s the cause that you need to fix which I think is your abusive partner.
-
-
You are soaking up everything he is telling you. Please don’t. 1st of all, many of us will recognise your feeling of needing alcohol to cope. I suspect quite a lot of us have been down that route. If it wasn’t alcahol it may be anti-depressants or sleeping tablets. It doesn’t matter they will try to use it against you to frighten you.
Please consider secretly recording his threats to take the kids or put them in social care. As KIP says, using this to try and make you stay is coercive control and it is illegal. I was at the point where I had an (detail removed by moderator) digital recorder in my pocket and I recorded everything. I caught more evidence on tape than I realised.
Please also consider visiting your GP. They can help you to safely reduce your alcahol intake and help you with the feelings that send you reaching for the bottle.
Well done for asking for support on here. There is a future for you and your children away from an abusive relationship. The very fact that he would rather put them into care than have them living with the woman who loves them shows how little he cares about them and how vindictive he is. No wonder you are struggling. My heart goes out to you xx
-
Hello, I had to call the National domestic abuse helpline recently for someone else. This person was too terrified to call themselves as they were so worried that their children would be taken from ghem. This is because the partner had been brainwashing her that they would be.
Well the lady on the helpline told me they will not involve social services unless the Mother is a terrorist, the children are being physically abused or severely neglected. None of which applies to you. She also said that the men threatening to take the children or have them taken away is one of the most common themes they hear. Xx -
I contacted refuge on the online chat. She said that social services would probably get involved. And that scares me I don’t want to lose my kids I’m so scared I don’t want to stay and im too scared to go. He has put me though so much c**p and now I’m stuck like this. He tells me off about drinking but then says it’s ok and he understands that I do it to relax. I think I need to sort myself out and get away from him. But that’s easier said than done
-
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
