I’m struggling

[Aida]

Hi ladies,
I am new to this forum – sadly not new to the experiences, only new to realising them.
I’m struggling with understanding what is happening to my family. Things have always been up and down. Some threatening violence and red flags over a long period of years. In the last (detail removed by moderator) months the control, name calling and screeching at me has been unbearable. He has manipulated me, lied to people about me and threatened me so much so my teenager has had to mediate between us (which concerns me). Can abuse creep on us like this? Is it because we normalise until it become so obvious to ignore. I sit here wondering how I got here and why it can’t be fixed.

Thanks for reading my post.

[hop]

It creeps up on us because it starts of small and wears us down over time. Then it slowly gets worse, until yeah we’ve normalised it and wiped the not so bad bits from our minds because they could have been worse.
He can’t be fixed. It doesn’t matter what you do. He’s the one with the problem but at the very least he makes you think it’s both of you. You and your family deserve better than this. How must mediating between 2 adults be for your teenage child and seeing their mum being treated in such a way. Be strong x*x take care 💖

[FindingMemo]

Snap! Unfortunately I understand completely. The realisation is early days for me too. I’m trying to take baby steps to a better future. Best wishes to you.x

[Aida]

Thank you ladies. I am so relieved to realise there is this support out there for those evenings when you are holed up in a room question how the hell I got here!

I have tried to take some control of it and told him (detail removed by moderator) I will be leaving once we have sold everything we own together. Deep down I know what I need to do but there is so much mental processing to do.

Hopefully today will be a good one.

[Author]

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