In a mess

[Wastedyears]

Hi, I am new to the forum and wasn’t sure what category this would come under.
I was in an abusive relationship for (detail removed by moderator) I left with my children (detail removed by moderator) and took out a lifelong restraining order. Despite this the abuse as continued to this day, I am scared to report to police ( because of previous experience s), I work with a domestic abuse agency but I know I am starting to disengage with them, I am also under the specialist mental team because of the impact of the abuse. I feel I am disengaging with them also. I am in such a mess with no one to talk to, I have no friends because I have continued the isolation he started. I really don’t know what to do. Thank you for reading

[Toofarr]

I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this. Do you have a support worker you can reach out to? If they’re breaching the restraining order can you not report that? I thought it was a criminal offence to breach just an order. I understand you’re scared. Please take care of yourself and continue to seek help. Don’t let him win.

[Wastedyears]

Thank you Toofarr I appreciate your reply. I do have a support worker from the current agency I work with but really don’t feel comfortable talking to her, I have had 3 different support workers over the past couple of months and only managed to engage with the first one. The police are aware of some of what is happening but I am just too scared to take that step in reporting again

[Allornothing]

Hi Wastedyears,

First off, I think you posting is a step in the right direction. Everything can feel so overwhelming that it is hard to find a way out but talking/typing it out can be a great start. You really should get the police involved otherwise he has still got a hold over you and as you say, the isolation he started will continue. The police have got to follow their procedures but in order to do so, they need us to take a stand. Have you had any support from Victim Support? It might be worth you trying to take a different angle on the support you are receiving, I personally found the victim support team very understanding and they just ‘get it’. Please try and reach out when you find the strength. Sending lots of love xx

[Wastedyears]

Thanks for the reply Allornothing , I know reporting him is key to the situation but I am finding it so hard after previous experience with the police. I didn’t think victim support would be able to help that’s why I did reach out to a domestic abuse agency, but unfortunately things were going well at the beginning but not so much now

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