Injustice

[Dragonfly]

I’m really struggling that he got off with attacking me. I can’t understand why it seems they believed him and not me. It was explained to me that because there were no witnesses it was his word against mine and because both our evidence was perfectly plausible they had no option but to let him off, not guilty. He was guilty, always will be guilty. Why is there no justice?

I’m sure he’s going about his life like nothings happened. I’m left with PTSD and everything that goes with that. He got away with it. Why, just why?!?!

I should be over this by now. Why is it always there, in my head, 24/7, it never leaves me. I’ve not gone for any counseling as I don’t think they’ll believe me either. It happened! The only way to get closure is for there to be justice. Him being found guilty. That’s never going to happen now.

Does he think about what he did? No I don’t think so, he’s done this to two other women I know of but I was the only one who reported him.

I thought the police were useless, good when they rescued me but completely pointless after that. The system sucks.

[Peaceful Pig]

We believe you dragonfly. Just because he wasn’t charged doesn’t mean it didn’t happen and it doesn’t mean it was OK – it wasn’t. You know your truth. There is no justice now but it’ll catch up with him in the end, there are always consequences from causing such suffering to others, though you may not necessarily have the pleasure of knowing about it.
Please don’t let this prevent you from seeking DV counselling. It could help you process this so it doesn’t forever go round in your mind and help you to move forward. You’ve beaten him by surviving and getting away x

[Dragonfly]

The good thing was he was charged, just found not guilty. I do get some satisfaction that he had to spend the whole weekend in the cells. Little bits of embarrassing karma have come his way too. I sound quite spiteful, can’t help it. I actually hate the ‘man’. He’s a coward.

I met a long lost friend the other day only to find out she’d gone thru something similar, and there was an actual witness. Still same outcome! What hope is there when the system doesn’t work?

The police believed me, the PF believed me, everyone believed me minus the two people he actually has as friends ofcourse. WA were there for me.

I need to do something to help myself. I’ve not been wallowing, been active, sociable etc. Maybe I need to focus more on myself and stop acting like I’m invincible.

Apologies for sounding like a proper moan here. I need to change the focus from him to me, make my life better. Just stop.

[KIP.]

Hey there. The level of proof for a conviction is very very high. It has to be beyond all reasonable doubt so please please don’t blame yourself. What you did was amazing. You held him accountable for his actions and you made a statement against him. If other women were brave enough to come forward and make statements, these can be used in corroboration in court. So when he does it in future. Your statements can be used as evidence against him. Just because the evidence wasn’t sufficient to meet the standards required for a conviction in no way means you were not believed. No one would put themselves through the hell of the court system without cause. These men are very sad individuals and will never change. They will never find peace and happiness. They just don’t have it in them. My ex carries on like nothing happened. They will justify their actions to themselves but others around them will see that mask slip. The mask always does. I found a great councellor to see me through a very rough patch but things will get better in time. Meanwhile, be kind to yourself x PS did you claim criminal injuries and have you thought about suing him in the civil courts?

[Confused123]

Hey HUn

Welldone for just reporting him, my ex got away too with trying to kill me as no witness would speak up and defend me , it does hurt but in time u move on, def take up counselling this is what helpme get over it

[Anonymous]

Hi hun

I know exactly how you feel i was also let down by police.. iam.still fighting

I sent them another email of a confession about facing my abuser as they did not belive me that my ex brought that memory back

It empowered me hun … keep fighting i am

I slated the police in my email

[Dragonfly]

Thanks for your replies. It just sucks eh?! I’ve not gone thru civil courts kip, don’t think I have the energy. I can see lots of us don’t get the justice we deserve. It doesn’t sit right with me.

I do get some peace tho from all of you survivors. Thank you all. X

[Author]

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